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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think children have the freedom to make mistakes, while other people believe that adults should prevent children from making mistakes. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some
people
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 think children have the freedom to make
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a fault
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fault
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faults
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, while other
people
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 believe that adults should prevent
adolescent
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adolescents
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 from making
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a misstep
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misstep
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missteps
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. Discuss both views and give your opinion. In
this
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 day and age, a debate with regard to juvenile’s freedom of choice has been sparked, drawing much attention from the public. While some
people
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 insist that preventing them from making omission plays an integral role in rearing offspring’s characteristics, I would side with those who are of opinion that allowing them to fluff can improve their self-confidence.
On the other hand
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, averting
youngster
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youngsters
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 to stumble can enhance their self-discipline could be plausible to some extent.
In other words
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, those
kid
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kids
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 tend to be more careful in making plans in order to avoid wrongdoings.
This
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 may act as a precursor to not only high academic performance but
also
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a
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apply
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self-esteem from their peer groups.
However
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,
those teenager
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that teenager
those teenagers
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 who are taught to not making any missteps cannot remedy the sudden problems that are not instructed.
Therefore
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, they neither cultivate life experiences nor hone practical skills.
On the other hand
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, there is ample evidence that permitting
adolescent
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adolescents
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 to make missteps is inclined to help them feel self-confidence and resilience whether they fail.
In other words
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,
toddler
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toddlers
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 are inclined to express their ideas with other
people
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 courageously compared to those who are taught not to flub.
Therefore
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 they can stand a better chance of learning from the fault, which is the driving force behind remembering their omission longer as well as avoiding future missteps. Another compelling reason is that
teenager
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teenagers
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 can enable to enlighten themselves on different aspects of life since they must not consider the mistakes that they will make.
Thus
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, they can improve their attributes
such
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 as
:
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apply
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 adaptability, creativity and collaborative skills. In conclusion,
although
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 preventing
youngster
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youngsters
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 from making mistakes can help them enhance their characteristics, I believe that permit them to fluff can improve their self-confidence.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • freedom to make mistakes
  • critical thinking skills
  • lifelong learning
  • guided learning environment
  • resilience
  • independence
  • overprotective
  • dependency
  • problem-solving skills
  • confidence
  • negative consequences
  • learning process
  • personal growth
  • trial and error
  • balance safety and learning
  • development
  • support and guidance
  • empowerment
  • risk-taking
  • life lessons
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