Our personalities are predefined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing can be done to change our character traits to what extent do you agree?

#personalities #predefined #genes #change #character #traits

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Genes are fundamental components in living organisms, shaping various characteristics, including

personality

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traits

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. Some believe that human personalities are entirely determined by

genetics

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and are

therefore

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unchangeable.

However

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while

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genetics

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undeniably influence certain aspects of our character, I argue that they do not entirely define who we are. Environmental factors,

such

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as the "21

-day

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rule

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" and cosmetic

surgery

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, can significantly alter

personality

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traits

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and

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

Firstly

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, the "21

-day

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rule

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" demonstrates that internal

traits

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can be reshaped through consistent practice.

This

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concept suggests that by engaging in a new

behavior

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behaviour

show examples

for 21 consecutive days, individuals can develop habits that override genetic predispositions.

For example

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, a study conducted by Oxford University found that 95% of women who disliked exercise successfully adopted early morning running routines after adhering to the 21

-day

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rule

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This

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transformation illustrates that consistent

behavioral

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behavioural

show examples

practices can lead to changes in

personality

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traits

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such

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as discipline and perseverance, challenging the idea that our character is solely dictated by

genetics

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Furthermore

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, advances in cosmetic

surgery

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illustrate how external characteristics, often shaped by

genetics

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, can be modified, thereby influencing

personality

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. Many individuals who are dissatisfied with their physical appearance,

such

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as their eyes, nose, or legs, opt for cosmetic procedures to enhance their looks.

According to

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a financial report by the World Bank, South Korea, one of the world's top five economic powerhouses, derives substantial income from the beauty

surgery

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industry.

Moreover

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, a study from Korea University reported that 99% of individuals who underwent cosmetic

surgery

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experienced not only improved appearance but

also

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enhanced self-confidence and

overall

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life satisfaction.

This

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suggests that altering physical

traits

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can have a profound impact on one’s self-perception and,

consequently

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, on their

personality

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. In conclusion,

while

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genetics

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play a crucial role in shaping our initial

personality

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traits

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, they do not entirely predetermine who we are. The ability to change

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

through practices like the 21

-day

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rule

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as well as

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the transformative effects of cosmetic

surgery

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, demonstrate that our personalities are not fixed and can be altered by our choices and environment.

Submitted by amittawin on Thu Aug 15 2024

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task achievement

While the essay effectively addresses the prompt and provides a strong argument, consider exploring a potential counter-argument to further enrich the discussion. This can demonstrate a more nuanced understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Make sure to clearly explain the connection between examples and the main arguments. While the examples provided are relevant, explicitly tying them back to the thesis can strengthen the argument.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear and logical structure, with an introduction, supporting body paragraphs, and a conclusion that effectively summarizes the main points.

task achievement

The use of specific examples, such as the '21-day rule' and the impact of cosmetic surgery on personality traits, adds depth and relevance to the argument.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

334 words

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Many people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subject. But others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject that they are good at or they find the most interest. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. While other people think it is the fault of the parents. Discuss both side and give your opinion

One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is a problem about a traffic on roads around the world. It is undeniable that transportation by the car has become an essential part of our life. However, these days it become much difficult and create a traffic jam.

Some people believe that children should spend all their free time with their families. Others believe that this is unnecessary or even negative. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. agree = maintain, own traditions disagree = cultures, problem sosializing