Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant example if necessary.

#salary #job #satisfaction

this

world where everything is has

price

Add an article

a price

show examples

people

are becoming more

money oriented

Add a hyphen

money-oriented

show examples

. In

such

a situation, it is vital for

people

to choose which is more important. I disagree with the given statement and my view

are

Change the verb form

show examples

explained in the following paragraph.

First

, the content of

work

is more important in one’s

life

to live a good

life

. By

this

Add a comma

,this

show examples

I mean that, if we love the

work

in which we are interested that gives us more happiness and

also

our performance will increase eventually, which will help us to grow in professional career.

For example

, the founder of Facebook,

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

started his profession with low income and gradually he is one of the most famous and richest persons in the modern era,

this

is because he was very passionate about his

work

, and he is more satisfied with it.

Further

, It will help us to be relaxed and

Correct your spelling

calm

show examples

clam

Correct your spelling

calm

show examples

which is very essential in the latest development of technology. Which will help us to be

Change preposition

show examples

right

Correct article usage

the right

show examples

path.

Second

people

who are satisfied with their

work

will have enough time to develop other activities. In a recent study shown by the

times

Change the capitalization

Times

show examples

of India, many

people

who are enjoying their

work

will

also

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

time to spend on their personal interest activities by which they can develop other activities.

For example

, the Captain of India cricket team, M.S Dhoni, because he was pleased with his

work

life

, He has shown his passion in his playing cricket which has made him

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

earn more.

addition

Add a comma

,addition

show examples

it will make them

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

choose their passion as their career which they will happy in doing it. In conclusion, Some

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

prefer to get more money than their personal satisfaction.

However

, I believe that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

work

Add a hyphen

work-life

show examples

life

balance is vital in order to be

creativity

Replace the word

creative

show examples

and help us to spend some time with our passion.

Submitted by Barmagml on Wed Oct 06 2021

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

313 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

remuneration
financial security
motivation
luxuries
material possessions
fulfillment
work-life balance
stress levels
mental well-being
job security

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Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant example if necessary.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on individualism, with people prioritizing their personal goals and desires over collective interests. Is this a positive or negative development?

Scientists believe that computers will become more intelligent than human beings. Some people find it is a positive trend while others think it is a negative development. Discuss both points and give your own opinion.