Computer games are becoming very popular among children of all ages and nationalities. Parents say they are concerned because these games have little educational value and many harmful effects. Do you agree or disagree?

#computer #games #children #ages #nationalities #parents #value #effects

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this

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, modern era the technology has made rapid progress in the

last

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few years,

thus

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it has given feasibility to operate any

games

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even on the smallest device.

Although

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, many people believe that it has a major effect on the

students

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and ones who play the

games

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online. I agree with the given statement as it will reduce to be creative and has some dangerous impact.

Firstly

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, spending more

time

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on online

games

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Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will impact their studies and imagination. In the recent report of the Hindustan times show that there is rapid progress in the school going student for spending more

time

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in involving themself in computer

games

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, as result

this

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year the percentage of passing

students

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has reduced dramatically. It shows that pupils, who are not spending more

time

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studying the regular curriculum are falling behind than those

students

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who are spending less

time

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Change preposition

apply

show examples

playing

games

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Further

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, It will reduce to think more which eventually makes them

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

be less

creativity

Replace the word

creative

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in their

life

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Secondly

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, it has many sides

effect

Fix the agreement mistake

effects

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of playing

games

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Change preposition

show examples

computers as well as on mobile phones, Most of them who spend playing

games

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more will lose their

Correct your spelling

eyesight

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eye sight

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eyesight

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which will cause them to wear

glass

Fix the agreement mistake

glasses

show examples

. Which eventually will impact their

life

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For example

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, In China, most of the

students

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wear

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

eyeless even during the initial stage of their

life

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further

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, many

students

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will fall ill when they try to study on the books. According to DR. Patel, there is an increase in cases of headaches special in lower-class

students

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as a result

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of them had low grades in their studies. Spending more

time

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online

games

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will cause them to pay a high price by visiting hospitals. In conclusion, some believe that computer

games

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are essential, but it has major effects on student future and can lead to damage other parts of the body. Which will cause them to harm in the later stages in

life

Use synonyms

Submitted by Barmagml on Wed Oct 06 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

326 words

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Computer games are becoming very popular among children of all ages and nationalities. Parents say they are concerned because these games have little educational value and many harmful effects. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

What differentiates those who view money as less important in their work from others, according to the text?

Some people think that some type of criminals should not go to prison, instead they should do unpaid work in the community. To what extent do you agree?

Nowadays, children spend too much time watching TV and playing computer games. Some people believe this has negative effects on children's mental abilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There are dangerous emergencies like earthquakes, fires, etc., but you can avoid and escape if you have the safety skills. Write an essay of about 300 words on the importance of these skills and how to keep individuals out of danger.