Computer games are becoming very popular among children of all ages and nationalities. Parents say they are concerned because these games have little educational value and many harmful effects. Do you agree or disagree?

#computer #games #children #ages #nationalities #parents #value #effects

this

, modern era the technology has made rapid progress in the

last

few years,

thus

it has given feasibility to operate any

games

even on the smallest device.

Although

, many people believe that it has a major effect on the

students

and ones who play the

games

online. I agree with the given statement as it will reduce to be creative and has some dangerous impact.

Firstly

, spending more

time

on online

games

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will impact their studies and imagination. In the recent report of the Hindustan times show that there is rapid progress in the school going student for spending more

time

in involving themself in computer

games

, as result

this

year the percentage of passing

students

has reduced dramatically. It shows that pupils, who are not spending more

time

studying the regular curriculum are falling behind than those

students

who are spending less

time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

playing

games

Further

, It will reduce to think more which eventually makes them

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

be less

creativity

Replace the word

creative

show examples

in their

life

Secondly

, it has many sides

effect

Fix the agreement mistake

effects

show examples

of playing

games

Change preposition

show examples

computers as well as on mobile phones, Most of them who spend playing

games

more will lose their

Correct your spelling

eyesight

show examples

eye sight

Correct your spelling

eyesight

show examples

which will cause them to wear

glass

Fix the agreement mistake

glasses

show examples

. Which eventually will impact their

life

For example

, In China, most of the

students

wear

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

eyeless even during the initial stage of their

life

further

, many

students

will fall ill when they try to study on the books. According to DR. Patel, there is an increase in cases of headaches special in lower-class

students

as a result

of them had low grades in their studies. Spending more

time

online

games

will cause them to pay a high price by visiting hospitals. In conclusion, some believe that computer

games

are essential, but it has major effects on student future and can lead to damage other parts of the body. Which will cause them to harm in the later stages in

life

Submitted by Barmagml on Wed Oct 06 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

326 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Computer games are becoming very popular among children of all ages and nationalities. Parents say they are concerned because these games have little educational value and many harmful effects. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people that professionals, such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In spite of many advances women have made in education and employment, they continue to be at a disadvantage when it comes to pay and promotion. In your view, what should be done to promote equality of opportunity for men and women in the workplace?

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.