IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

It could be argued that technology makes our lives easier and simpler. But there are certainly people who feel life has become more complicated due to modern inventions. Which opinion do you agree with? In your essay, include supporting details.

#technology #lives #people #life #inventions
Some people think that
technology
 makes our lives more convenient while others consider
technology
 actually makes our life more complicated. In my opinion, we cannot live without
technology
 because we have gotten used to the
convenience
 that
technology
 brings to us particularly, the inventions of cell phones and the
internet
 have greatly changed our lifestyles. I will explain that as follows.
First
 of all, the improvement of mobile phones changes the ways of our communication. Traditionally, we used analogue phones to talk, ear to ear. Nowadays, we can talk through lenses on smartphones,
face
 to
face
.
This
 is the proven fact that
technology
 brings
convenience
 to us.
For instance
, When I was a child, I just chatted with my grandmother through traditional telephones. Even though I missed my grandmother I still could not meet her. Thanks to the invention of smartphones, I can directly communicate and talk
face
 to
face
. I have enjoyed the
convenience
 that
technology
 brings to me.
However
, somebody would feel it is very troublesome because they probably increase the chances and time of
formal
Add an article
the formal
show examples
 meeting.
Furthermore
, the invention of
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
also
 positively enhances the way we shop, study, and
Work
. In the past, we only shop physically, selecting stuff without comparing prices; We attend classrooms, gaining knowledge from teachers; We go to
work
 in the office, dealing
tasks
Change preposition
with tasks
show examples
 in person. Now, people can compare the prices of one merchandise, learn subjects or get degrees, and do remote
work
 through the
internet
.
For example
, I complete a certification, shop and do remote
work
 online, which makes it easier to complete all I want to do with
advancement
Add an article
the advancement
show examples
 of
technology
.
However
, the
convenience
 of the
Internet
 leads me to fill up my schedule, have less leisure time, which I am exhausted from. People who think
technology
 brings complex life could refer to my condition. In sum, we currently live in an environment where
technology
 is. I believe that the existence of
technology
 is to bring humans a better life.
Submitted by shenghung1027 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: