Some people think that government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of
children
Use synonyms
with obesity
desease
Correct your spelling
disease
are
growed
Correct your spelling
grown
show examples
up , some people
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
that
Correct your spelling
government
goverment
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
should be responsible for
this
Linking Words
problem. In
this
Linking Words
essay
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,essay
show examples
I will partly support
this
Linking Words
statement.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern
society
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,society
show examples
we have plenty of different
food
Use synonyms
which is easy to buy .
This
Linking Words
food
Use synonyms
consists
from
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of
show examples
sugar and oils.
Children
Use synonyms
love sweet
food
Use synonyms
, and the shops have
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
assortiment
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assortment
of it. A lot of
advertisemets
Correct your spelling
advertisements
offer
to
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apply
show examples
people fast and sweet
food
Use synonyms
, which can lead to
obessity
Correct your spelling
obesity
,
esspecially
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especially
among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
fast
Add a hyphen
fast-food
show examples
food
Use synonyms
restaurants
such
Linking Words
as Mac Donalds and KFS are very popular all over the world, because
this
Linking Words
meal is cheap and fast, and gives opportunity to the parents do not cook at home. Another reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
increasing
Add an article
the increasing
show examples
quality of cases of
Use synonyms
children
Replace the word
childhood
show examples
obesity
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
they prefer to spend a lot of time watching TV, Youtube, playing computer games and using social media. It leads to the lack of movements , and to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
problems with weight
as a result
Linking Words
. To solve
this
Linking Words
problem
Correct your spelling
government
govermant
Correct article usage
the govermant
show examples
should create more
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
centres , and arrange a lot of sports events for
children
Use synonyms
, to involve them
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
sport
Add an article
the sport
show examples
. In conclusion, I would argue that
Correct your spelling
government
goverment
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
is responsible for
childeren's
Correct your spelling
children's
obesity as far as their parents. Parents should provide their's
children
Use synonyms
with fresh and healthy
food
Use synonyms
, meanwhile
Correct your spelling
government
goverment
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
shuold
Correct your spelling
should
create more sports facilities in the cities, and fast
food
Use synonyms
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to be forbidden in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
schools and
kindergardens
Correct your spelling
kindergartens
.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • policies
  • responsibility
  • health and well-being
  • education and awareness programs
  • childhood obesity
  • food advertising and labeling
  • unhealthy food
  • supportive environments
  • recreational facilities
  • collaboration
  • healthcare providers
What to do next:
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