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Band 5

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #attention
Nowadays,
advertisement
 is
obviously
Add an article
an obviously
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 crucial role in commercial
markets
. Some
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
show examples
 believe that advertising can convince
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
customers to buy goods.
On the other hand
, others admire that it is not to focus on
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
powerful media to purchase others and
also
 should ignore it. So, there are plenty of distinct factors to attract them.
First
 of all, in terms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
advertising is the main factor in choosing the article. Most companies will engage the media organizations or agencies where can create the
interested
Replace the word
interesting
show examples
 presentation of these products to urge selling in competitive
markets
.
For example
, some organization has increased higher rate of selling from having the motivated
advertisement
.
Moreover
, some
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
 decide
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 waste money with whatever they have been seeing for
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
 time.
In contrast
, other groups do not pay attention
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
Add an article
the advertisement
show examples
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
 because they have been thinking it is
simply
Replace the word
simple
show examples
 and
also
 cannot attract several citizens to obtain merchandise. For
instant
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an instant
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, elderly people are not interested
what
Change preposition
in what
show examples
 is expressed via social media as they are lack
of
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apply
show examples
some skills
such
 as order of online
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
show examples
 and
not
Add a missing verb
do not
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 know how to pay money online. Significantly, the older generations have traditional habitats and they stickily like to buy in local
markets
 where have not known from having
advertisement
.
In addition
, in my
opinion
Add the comma(s)
,opinion
show examples
 that there should varying
advertisement
 in selling goods because the technologies have been developing quickly so that it is launched via advanced technologies and still can be accessible all
of
Change preposition
over
show examples
 the
world
Change to a plural noun
worlds
show examples
.
Therefore
, it enriches commercial
markets
 from looking for things and
also
 help people to be richer and be developed domestic economics. In conclusion,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advertising can access easily and has
tendency
Add an article
a tendency
the tendency
show examples
 to continue developing. Indeed, we should support the
advertisement
 to promote our product.
Submitted by tugsaphorn.sun on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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