IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

More developing countries are given aid from international organizations to help them in their development plans. Some people argue that financial aid is important but others suggest that practical aid and advice are more important . Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #aid #organizations #development #plans #people #advice
Financial
aid
 being received by developing nations helps solve the immediate problems of starvation and healthcare.
However
, they do not solve the long-term problem of making a developing country independent. On one hand, financial
aid
 is highly important because many of the developing
countries
 are suffering acute food and water shortages, and are
also
 suffering from diseases that have been eradicated in most developed
countries
.
Therefore
, based on the current situations engulfing most developing
countries
 financial
aid
, is something that they require immediately because it can help solve the on-the-spot problems.
For example
,
Countries
 like Madagascar, Yemen, Ethiopia, South Sudan, Somalia, and many more require both food and financial
aid
 from the United Nations to stop their respective populations from dying.
Furthermore
, practical
aid
 must follow, to be able to help a developing country become self-sufficient. Projects, which will help build sanitation plants, which will provide clean drinking water will not only help in allowing the people access to clean drinking water but
also
 gives them the opportunity to irrigate their farmlands.
This
 will
also
 help reduce waterborne diseases from forming.
In addition
, educational projects will allow people to build schools so that children can get the chance of an education.
Furthermore
, the construction of hospitals with the equipment which would be required to provide healthcare for natives will help to prolong their life, rather than losing
if
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
 in the name of curable diseases. In conclusion, I feel that both financial and practical
aid
 is needed, and should go hand in hand with each other when trying to make a developing nation independent.
Submitted by Nigelvictorlawrence on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: