IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The rising levels of congestion and air pollution found in most of the world's cities can be attributed directly to the rapidly increasing number of private cars in use. In order to reverse this decline in the quality of life in cities, attempts must be made to encourage people to use their cars less and public transport more. to what extend do you agree or disagree?

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In
this
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 day and age, more and more contemporary attention has been placed on whether city dwellers should be encouraged to use public transportation rather than private vehicles to diminish
traffic
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 snarls and
air
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 contamination. From my perspective, I side with the former state because of the reasonable explanations below.
First
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, it can be considered as an effective measure to deal with
traffic
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 jams when individuals commute by means of public
transport
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 rather than private vehicles. As a matter of fact, the
traffic
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 infrastructure in many countries can not meet the demand of citizens as the dimension of urban’s roads are too narrow, compared with the number of cars used on a regular basis.
Consequently
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, public
transport
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 like buses and metros can address the gridlocks because a large number of urban inhabitants could travel in a long distance at the same time.
This
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 can be exemplified by the prime case of Japan, where citizens mainly commute to and from work by subway, which can partly reduce the
traffic
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 congestion during rush hour.
Second
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, it is undeniable that encouraging urban dwellers to utilize public transportation can make substantial contributions to addressing the issue of polluted
air
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. More precisely, it is estimated that around 130 grams of carbon dioxide per
kilometer
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kilometre
show examples
 will be discharged from a car in use.
By comparison
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, with the use of means of public
transport
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such
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 as buses and subways, the number of carbon emissions could be diminished significantly, with 950 grams over 50 passengers per
kilometer
Change the spelling
kilometre
show examples
, according to some statistics in the year 2016.
Therefore
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, using more public
transport
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 can be a simple and feasible solution to mitigate
air
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 pollution in big cities. For the reasons mentioned above, I believe that the crowd’s awareness of using means of public
transport
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 should be raised in order to tackle
traffic
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 congestion and
air
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 degradation; only by doing so, could the quality of life be improved.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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