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Band 5.5

Some people believe that old buildings should be replaced with more modern ones. Other people argue that we should protect old buildings because they have a special value. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #buildings #ones #value
A handful
people
Change preposition
of people
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 consider
that old constructions
Change the determiner
that old construction
those old constructions
show examples
 need to be replaced by modern
buildings
.
However
, there are some individuals who believe that ancient
buildings
 must be saved as they have some historical value.
This
 essay will highlight the thought to replace old
constactions
Correct your spelling
constructions
construction
 with new ones and another opinion about protecting old
buildings
.
First
 of all, most of the
buildings
, which were built more than 70 years ago, are costly for living and not comfortable. It means that it is very expensive to maintain old constructions as electricity and water pipe systems need to be replaced. In my opinion, new highscrapes with
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
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 network systems are more comfortable for
residencial
Correct your spelling
residential
 or business
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
.
Classic
Add an article
A classic
The classic
show examples
 example is Dubai, where most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
 prefer living in modern apartments with high-speed elevators, panoramic windows and
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
 architectural innovations.
On the other hand
,
people
 should carefully consider that some ancient
constuctions
Correct your spelling
constructions
 have architectural and historical value for cities.
In other words
, some
buildings
 have artworks which were designed
hundreds
Add the preposition
ofhundreds
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 years ago;
therefore
, a lot of tourists can be interested to see them.
For example
, these constructions can be used as museums, so citizens can safe architectural artworks for their offsprings and
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
 tourist to their countries. In conclusion,
people
 need to find a balance between new and old
buildings
.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 most old
contructions
Correct your spelling
constructions
 do not suit for livings as they are costly and not comfortable, some of
historical
Add an article
the historical
show examples
 contractions can be used for museums. Meanwhile, I believe that for residence
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
people
 should build new modern structures.
Submitted by antonina.osmolskaya.a on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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