Doctors should be responsible for educating their patients about how to improve their health. Do you agree or disagree?

#doctors #patients #health

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Generally,

health

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is the most

improtant

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important

thing in life. The healthier life you are the happier life you have. Some experts suggest that

doctors

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should take

responsible

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responsibility

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for educating their

patients

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to develop their

health

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. Personally, I totally agree with

this

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statement.

This

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essay will demonstrate some reasons to support my idea.

First

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of all, physicians have more accurate information than

patients

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. They can advise which exercise can bring the appropriate benefits for the patient's

health

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condition.

Moreover

Linking Words

doctors

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can help their

patients

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control their diet by recommending

type

Add an article

a type

the type

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of food they should consume or avoid. Using

doctors

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Correct your spelling

advice

advices

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advice

pieces of advice

bits of advice

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will lead to the development of

patient's

Correct article usage

the patient's

show examples

health

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Secondly

Linking Words

, educating

patients

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about appropriate fitness will help them

aware

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be aware

show examples

of their

health

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Therefore

Linking Words

doctors

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can save their time in curing them because not only the rate of

being hospitalize

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being hospitalized

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but

also

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the rate of death will reduce

gradully

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gradually

For example

Linking Words

patient

Add an article

a patient

the patient

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who aware of their

health

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tends to quit bad habits

such

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as smoking or drinking alcohol which is one of the main factors that lead to several ailments. In conclusion,

doctors

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pay

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play

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the most important role in developing their

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patients

Change to a genitive case

patient's

patients'

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health

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education. It can be implied that without physicians' advice, there will be numerous

Change preposition

apply

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cases in

hospital

Correct article usage

the hospital

show examples

Submitted by Varaiphand on Tue Oct 12 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

207 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

holistic approach
preventive measures
chronic diseases
medical interventions
healthcare professionals
consultations
dietitians
health educators
literacy skills
visual aids
digital tools
reputable online resources
community programs
ongoing support
patient outcomes
initial guidance
mitigated
follow-up consultations

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Doctors should be responsible for educating their patients about how to improve their health. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

'People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities.' To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?

Sport is becoming a business. More and more companies are getting involved in sporting events. Do you think that it is a positive or negative development?

Many people nowadays prefer online shopping. Is it a positive or negative development?

Some people think that in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should make efforts in reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, social media has become an increasingly important part of many people's lives. What are the potential benefits and drawbacks of social media use? Do you believe the overall impact of social media is positive or negative?