Some people say that individuals who make a lot of money are most successful. Others think that those who contribute to society like scientists and teachers are most successful. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #individuals #money #society #scientists #teachers

The definition of being successful in

life

may vary from person to person. While some think that earning a fortune is a way to achieve

this

goal, others believe people contributing to humanity like scientists and teachers are the most successful. I deem that both of these notions have their own points and will analyze all aspects in my essay. Billionaires are no doubt role models for most individuals to admire and dream to have a

life like

Correct your spelling

lifelike

show examples

one of them. The reason for

this

perspective is simply because money is what individuals in

this

type of group are seeking as their major goal in

life

. Since being wealthy can provide you with priorities

such

as flying in the business suite, travelling at your disposal, or shopping without any hesitation, etc. It is a norm for people to pursue

such

an idea of being successful when they think they can have all conveniences that money brings. But the dark sides are rarely mentioned when stress, anxiety, responsibilities come along with wealth.

On the other hand

, people might consider success as what they call a meaningful

life

that is

sharing your knowledge and legacy with society. Their motive can be reputation and value for their name to be passed down through generations, or even for a greater good

such

as devoting their

life

to a specific academic field like many well-known scientists and researchers have done in the reality.

This

is a noble and precious way of living,

however

, a great price to pay when scarifying your private

life

in a belief. From my point of view, living a happy

life

is a successful

life

. Being grateful for what you have is the key to reach

this

goal. Each person has a different start in their lives and no one can predict the future. While it may be a good thing to try to reach higher than your abilities and break your boundaries, consequences are there to face.

Hence

, set the meaning of success by yourself, do not let others tell you how to live in

this

very one

life

. To conclude, let us live our own lives and set our own qualities for being successful without bearing the fear of judgment or guidance from others.

Submitted by jakedth162 on Tue Oct 12 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

375 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial prosperity
capitalizing
luxury travel
exclusive experiences
contributions to society
humanitarian workers
lasting impact
highly subjective
cultural, societal, and personal values
comfort and security
deeper personal satisfaction
holistic understanding

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Some people say that individuals who make a lot of money are most successful. Others think that those who contribute to society like scientists and teachers are most successful. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

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