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Band 7.5

In recent times, economic growth has helped many become richer, both in developed and developing countries. However, those in developed countries are not as happy as they were in the past. Why is this? What can be learned from this?

#times #growth #countries
Recently, the growth of the global economy has led to an increase in the number of rich
people
, both in developed and developing countries.
Nevertheless
, their mental health is not as good as expected when compared with the past. A primary factor is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 fact that wealthy
people
 have so much pressure from their
work
 that makes them less happy. To deal with
this
 problem,
work-life
balance
 is what we obtain from
this
 situation. Recently, many growing companies have done lots of
work
 owing to the worldwide economic growth.
In other words
, increasing demands caused by the larger group of wealthy
people
, who can afford more products or services, result in increasing supplies.
This
 leads to an increasing amount of
work
 in most companies.
Consequently
,
people
 who
work
 in a company have had a lot of stress from their
work
. Their stress can reduce their
happiness
 level which has negative effects on the overall
happiness
 of the whole country.
Furthermore
,
work-life
balance
 is what we learn from
this
 situation. To be happier, it is essential to schedule time for
work
 and a family. The government can assist
people
 to receive a healthy
work-life
balance
 by launching public policies which assign fewer workdays.
This
 helps
people
 spend more free time with their families or on relaxing activities
such
 as doing their hobbies.
As a result
, personal
happiness
 increases and it affects an increase in total
happiness
. The more efficient working process in companies is one of several benefits obtained from a good
work-life
balance
. In conclusion, the recent growth of the global economy affects
people
’s
happiness
 in developed countries which do not seem to be as happy as in the past.
However
, what
people
 learn from
this
 situation is how to
balance
 time for their
work
 and life. It leads to the way the government manages the issue and plays a crucial role in the development of overall individual
happiness
.
Submitted by unnop_0007 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Economic growth
  • Material wealth
  • Affluent societies
  • Social cohesion
  • Isolation and loneliness
  • Work-related stress
  • Professional expectations
  • Aspirations and reality
  • Environmental degradation
  • Sustainability
  • Consumerism
  • Comparison
  • Life balance
  • Mental well-being
  • Community relationships
  • Sustainable development
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