Some people think getting old is entirely bad, but other people do think it’s much better for old people to live now than in the past. Please show your idea with explanation, examples and your knowledge.

5.0 / 9

Band scoreView breakdown ↓

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →

Introduction

There are some discussions about whether

people

Use synonyms

getting old is a

whole

Change the adjective

wholly

show examples

negative thing, but the opposite view

believe

Change the verb form

believes

show examples

that the old

people

Use synonyms

are living better than before. From my standpoint, I reckon that many old persons are living better than in the past to some extent.

Body paragraph 1

Nowadays, there are more advanced medical equipment or therapies to cure patients,

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

means hospitals can serve

Remove the article

apply

show examples

better medical care to old persons.

Then

Linking Words

the

senior

Fix the agreement mistake

seniors

show examples

have a low rate of death from some disease.

Hence

Linking Words

, they are able to obtain a better life expectancy. Meanwhile, governments

also

Linking Words

provide decent pensions to the older, so that the old

people

Use synonyms

can live better than before.

Body paragraph 2

Besides

Linking Words

, if

people

Use synonyms

are getting old until they are able to retire, which means they have more

time

Use synonyms

to do whatever they want,

such

Linking Words

as fishing,

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

, climbing. Because most of

persons

Add an article

the persons

show examples

were strangled by their work when they were young, so they may not

controlled

Change the verb form

control

show examples

the balance between work and life.

Thus

Linking Words

, if

people

Use synonyms

are getting old ,they can live better than in the past

time

Use synonyms

Body paragraph 3

On the other hand

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

getting old is entirely bad, because their physical conditions are worse than before.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the older have

Change the article

show examples

increasing number of probability

Change preposition

apply

show examples

getting sick. And in other aspects, the old

people

Use synonyms

may lose their energy or memories. So getting old is entirely bad for the senior to some extent.

Conclusion

In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

the physical conditions of old

people

Use synonyms

may be worse than before, the

senior

Fix the agreement mistake

seniors

show examples

also

Linking Words

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

better medical treatment and more

time

Use synonyms

to develop their hobbies.

Hence

Linking Words

, I insist to agree that old individuals are living better than in the past

time

Use synonyms

fanganqi79

Oct 16, 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

5.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

278 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Modern technology, such as personal computers and the Internet, have made it possible for many people to do their work from home at least part of the time instead of going to an office every day. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Today, advanced technology highly impacts the way of people's lives. Personal computers such as laptops and tablets with fast internet access can replace the need for workers to go to their offices. Since, these tools provide any necessary things for workers, such as instant communications, either by texting, phone calling , or video meeting, including all PC applications that are used in conventional computers. This condition helps workers to achieve more goals in the fastest way by using efficient time management, and building new effective types of work. However, working from home means fewer body movement activities. Workers do not have to go to their office by walking, driving or taking public transportation. This essay will elaborate my opinion about these.
6.5
band
It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Making tough decisions is an important part of people's everyday life. I believe that the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages.
7
band
Some people think that manufacturers and shopping malls should sell fewer packaged products while others argue that people have the responsibility to buy products with less packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion
Issues related to packaged products are the core argument of citizens throughout the world, especially the responsibility of sellers and consumers. However, it is more favours for consumers to reduce pack when buying goods due to demand and environmental reservations, more people believe that the problems can be solved by the traders by reducing supplements.
7
band
Some health professionals suggest that older people spend more time socializing with others and playing sports to stay healthy, but many retired people have experienced loneliness and a lack of fitness. Why has this happened? What can be done to address this?
Some health experts indicate that elderly people should allocate more time to socialising with their acquaintances and working out to keep fit. However, Individuals who have been retired have suffered from loneliness and are less healthy. Some reasons, such as lack of support from their surroundings and loosening the excitement, might cause this to happen. This essay will examine the issues and propose potential solutions.
6.5
band
Your local council is considering closing a sports and leisure centre that it runs, in order to save money. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter give details of how you and your friends or family use the centre explain why the centre ts important for the local community describe the possible effects on local people if the centre closes
I am writing t express my concern about the local council's plan to close the sports and leisure centre in our area.

Some people think getting old is entirely bad, but other people do think it’s much better for old people to live now than in the past. Please show your idea with explanation, examples and your knowledge.

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that manufacturers and shopping malls should sell fewer packaged products while others argue that people have the responsibility to buy products with less packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some health professionals suggest that older people spend more time socializing with others and playing sports to stay healthy, but many retired people have experienced loneliness and a lack of fitness. Why has this happened? What can be done to address this?