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Band 5

Some believe that modern technology is increasing the gap between rich and poor people, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#believe #technology #gap #people #answers
In the complex
Correct your spelling
world
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word
Correct your spelling
world
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 today, the knowledge of
technology
 significantly develop.
People
 can easily get benefits from
this
 modern development.
However
, some individuals believe that the more development of
technology
, the more distance between the rich and the poor while others argue. Personally, I agree with the
first
 idea.
This
 essay will show you the reasons
of
Change preposition
for
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 both sides. Obtaining the advantages of
technology
,
people
needs
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need
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 to access
to
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apply
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the internet which is rarely used in the lower
class
 or even some middle
class
. To illustrate, using
FaceTime
Correct article usage
the FaceTime
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 method
instead
 of meeting face to face is more convenient only for the upper
class
 while it is hardly impossible for the lower
class
 who live in the suburbs or remote areas where
internet
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the internet
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 cannot be accessible.
In other words
, without money,
people
 receive any benefits from
this
 innovation.
Moreover
, the poor do not have enough time to learn a new
technology
 which is dramatically improved. They have to do essential things to earn a living
first
. So, there is no time left for them.
This
 means while the rich can easily learn and make use of
technology
, the poor are left behind.
On the other hand
, if the government use
technology
 in order to increase the standard of living for all
people
, it seems that
technology
 can be lessened the gap between the rich and the poor.
For
instance
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,instance
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 using the innovation to improve the system of transportation, all the lower and upper
class
 can not only save time but
also
more
Add a missing verb
be more
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 convenient while
traveling
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travelling
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 around the country. Having considered
this
 matter carefully, in my perspective even
technology
 brings a lot of benefits to
people
,
this
 innovation increases more distance between
people
 who lack
of
Remove the preposition
apply
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money and those who have enough.
Therefore
, my
suggest
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suggestion
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 is government should use it wisely
otherwise
 it will create more problems due to the larger gap.
Submitted by Varaiphand on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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