IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

More and more people want to buy famous brands in clothes cars and other items . What are the reasons behind this trend? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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In our present
world
Use synonyms
, luxury
items
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 reflect one’s status level in a community. Several individuals purchase branded
items
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 in clothing, vehicles or others. I strongly believe it’s a negative notion as
such
Linking Words
 influence on
people
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 could divert
people
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 from education and encourage
in
Change preposition
apply
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unwanted spending. On the one side, the most significant reason for using branded
items
Use synonyms
 allows one to express his/her social status and prosperity which allow them
show
Add the particle
to show
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 off and demand respect off it. In our modern
world
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,
people
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 value materialistic
items
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such
Linking Words
 as watches or phones which makes them distinct and different from
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
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 of the
world
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.
For example
Linking Words
, iPhones are considered
as
Correct your spelling
a
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symbol
Add an article
a symbol
the symbol
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 of social status and because of
this
Linking Words
 most celebrities in the
world
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use
Add a comma
,use
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apple
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Apple
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 phones are their primary daily driver as compared to other brands.
Therefore
Linking Words
, give a sense of worthiness and confidence without actually saying
out
Correct pronoun usage
it out
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 loud. On the other side,
such
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trend
Correct article usage
a trend
show examples
 develops a negative effect. The primary reason illustrates the unwanted spending and illegal means of acquiring it.
This
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 could
further
Linking Words
 attenuate young minds to purchase expensive
items
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 more than they could afford and
this
Linking Words
 could lead to committing illegal acts in order to earn extra cash.
For instance
Linking Words
, in China, a teenager was enticed to sell his kidney to an illegal organ trafficker to acquire
lump
Correct article usage
a lump
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 sum
of
Change preposition
apply
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amount
Correct article usage
the amount
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 to purchase the latest iPhone.
Thus
Linking Words
 clouding
people
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 to commit unwanted offences to buy expensive
items
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. In conclusion, I feel costly
items
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 don’t value ones
moral
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morals
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 and character, it makes them more shallow and selfish.
People
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 need to be educated or educate themselves to be
better
Add an article
a better
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person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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 and prevent them from being under the influence of
such
Linking Words
 useless
trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
show examples
.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social Status
  • Proliferation
  • Globalization
  • Targeted Advertising
  • Perceived Value
  • Desirability
  • Reliability
  • Peer Pressure
  • Consumer Satisfaction
  • Innovation
  • Competition
  • Excessive Consumerism
  • Social Classes
  • Detract
  • Appreciation
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