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Writing Samples
Band 4

Some think that father's should have time off from work after the birth of a child. Do you agree on this or not.

#think #father #time #work #birth #child
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Some people believe that
father
Correct article usage
a father
show examples
 must have
days-off
Correct your spelling
days off
show examples
 and be responsible after having a baby. I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement. In the following paragraphs, I will discuss the importance of being available at home 24/7 after giving
child birth
Correct your spelling
childbirth
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 fathers.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, as soon as having an infant,
parents'lives
Correct your spelling
parents lives
 will be complicated. The mother will be sick and, busy with feeding and taking care of the new toddler, so
father
Correct article usage
the father
show examples
 plays a crucial role.
First
Linking Words
, he can assist with household activities
such
Linking Words
 as washing dishes, cleaning the home and preparing meals.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
female-parent
Correct your spelling
female parent
show examples
 suffers mentally, physically and emotionally, so she needs someone
besides
Linking Words
 her.
For instance
Linking Words
, my aunt was pregnant with a twin and she lived in a remote town, when she gave birth to the children, her husband was with her and helped with household work, and taking care of the twins after she took a nap.
Thus
Linking Words
, the father's presence is essential.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the responsibilities of having a new member in the family will increase gradually.
Hence
Linking Words
, some fathers need to work extra hours to maintain
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 children a better life and education. They should work overtime to supply their sons and daughters
the
Change preposition
with the
show examples
 requirements
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 milk and
disaper
Correct your spelling
disappear
diaper
diapers
. To summarise, the absence of males-parents will cause many problems, especially when there is no one
can
Correct pronoun usage
who can
show examples
 look after their families.
As a result
Linking Words
, the government should offer the men time-off with salary.
Submitted by fatmahaleesa on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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