Public celebrations (national days, festivals) are held in many countries. Some people say that these celebrations are a waste of money and we should spend money on more important things. Do you agree or disagree?

#celebrations #festivals #countries #people #waste #money

Public celebrations, which are held in many countries, seem to be allocated much money.

Therefore

, some people consider that governments

shoud

Correct your spelling

should

concentrate their expenditure on more important things.

However

, there are some reasons why I strongly disagree with

this

point of view. One of the main benefits

about

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big celebrations is boosting the economy. The fascination of those special days attracts visitors from other places, even other countries. As a consequence, demands on services that come with tourism occurring

such

hotel

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hotels

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restaurant

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restaurants

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and

souvenir

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souvenirs

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, increase. That means local people get opportunities to earn a fortune.

For example

Buon

Correct article usage

the Buon

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Ma Thuot Coffee

festival

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Festival

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is taken place

each

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every

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two years in Daklak province - a high land of Vietnam, not only interests thousands of tourists but

also

gather a large sum of enterprises to join. Another point to be considered is spiritual values. People would like to enjoy happy times

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apply

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or experience national cultures through public celebrations.

This

can be seen at Hue festivals which has a variety of traditional activities. Especially Aodai performance, in which models represent hundreds of types of

aodai

Correct your spelling

today

ao dai

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traditional clothing of Vietnamese. Obviously,

the

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apply

show examples

spiritual values are as much important as other material things. In conclusion, the money needed to celebrate festivals is quite expensive, but having said that they are worth every penny for both economy and spiritual values.

Submitted by Andy on Thu Oct 21 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

225 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Public celebrations (national days, festivals) are held in many countries. Some people say that these celebrations are a waste of money and we should spend money on more important things. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do disadvantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people feel that we should protect all wild animals. Other people think that only some wild animals should be protected. Discuss both points of view and give your opinon.

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be abel to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

some people work for the same organisation all their working life. others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.