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Writing Samples
Band 4

Public celebrations (national days, festivals) are held in many countries. Some people say that these celebrations are a waste of money and we should spend money on more important things. Do you agree or disagree?

#celebrations #festivals #countries #people #waste #money
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Public celebrations, which are held in many countries, seem to be allocated much money.
Therefore
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, some people consider that governments
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
 concentrate their expenditure on more important things.
However
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, there are some reasons why I strongly disagree with
this
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 point of view. One of the main benefits
about
Change preposition
of
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 big celebrations is boosting the economy. The fascination of those special days attracts visitors from other places, even other countries. As a consequence, demands on services that come with tourism occurring
such
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 as
hotel
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hotels
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,
restaurant
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restaurants
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 and
souvenir
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souvenirs
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, increase. That means local people get opportunities to earn a fortune.
For example
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,
Buon
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the Buon
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 Ma Thuot Coffee
festival
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Festival
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 is taken place
each
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every
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 two years in Daklak province - a high land of Vietnam, not only interests thousands of tourists but
also
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 gather a large sum of enterprises to join. Another point to be considered is spiritual values. People would like to enjoy happy times
,
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apply
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 or experience national cultures through public celebrations.
This
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 can be seen at Hue festivals which has a variety of traditional activities. Especially Aodai performance, in which models represent hundreds of types of
aodai
Correct your spelling
today
ao dai
,
a
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apply
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traditional clothing of Vietnamese. Obviously,
the
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apply
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spiritual values are as much important as other material things. In conclusion, the money needed to celebrate festivals is quite expensive, but having said that they are worth every penny for both economy and spiritual values.
Submitted by Andy on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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