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Band 8

Some people think that having a retirement age of 65 years is unfair. They believe that certain workers should retire earlier and get pension at an early age. Do you agree or disagree? Give examples

#people #retirement #age #years #workers #pension
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The best
age
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 for retirement is quite arguable and require a lot of
discussions
Fix the agreement mistake
discussion
show examples
 and thoughtful consideration in today's era. To retire at the
age
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 of 65 or earlier both have merits and demerits, but I opine that it should be a choice to be given to an individual after crossing certain
age
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.
Firstly
Linking Words
, due to the increased cost of living, many
people
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 can not afford to retire early to meet their living expenses because the government pension and savings are not sufficient to survive.
Secondly
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, much older populations like to remain active, and they enjoy interaction, socialization and working part-time at a later stage of their lives.
Furthermore
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, they may feel lonely or depressed if they choose to stay home full-time.
Moreover
Linking Words
, research, innovations, improved medical treatment, health awareness and healthy diets have increased
life
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 span and so
people
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 can work extended years and can not afford to stay longer at homes with limited income.
Nevertheless
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, by keeping the older population active, the government will have to spend less on old
age
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 or towards health care treatment so it would be a win, win situation for both. If workers retire earlier
then
Linking Words
 it would be added pressure on the ministry spending and less experienced workforce in the market.
Moreover
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, it would create a challenge for youngsters to penetrate the market. It is more likely that older
people
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 will die earlier before they can be eligible and benefit to get the ministry pension for the tax, they had contributed for most of their
life
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 if the authorities will keep increasing the retirement
life
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. Overall, older
people
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 should be allowed to enjoy their later part since they have worked most of their
life
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. To summarise, the authorities should keep options open for
people
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 to decide when do they want to retire and get a pension after a certain
life
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 and working for a certain number of years.
Submitted by ankit1182000 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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