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Band 3.5

CCTV cameras are a common sight in town centres, on public transport and outside many businesses. They not only help identify and apprehend criminals but also serve as a crime deterrent. However, some people believe that they are intrusive and constitute a breach of privacy.

#cctv #cameras #sight #town #centres #transport #businesses #criminals #crime #deterrent #people #breach #privacy
To avoid criminality
CCTV
cameras
used
Add a missing verb
are used
show examples
 in city
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
. It helps to identify criminals and serves as a crime detector,
however
 it destroys
personal
Correct article usage
the personal
show examples
privacy
 of citizens. In my opinion,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 for public
safety
overweights
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overweight
show examples
 its difficulties for any humankind
privacy
.
First
 of all, while controlling the town
center
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centre
show examples
 with the help of
CCTV
cameras
, citizens feel
safety
Replace the word
safe
show examples
 themself. Any kind of crime and
Correct your spelling
bullying
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bulling
Correct your spelling
bullying
show examples
 will be detected with camera control. If
suspective
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a suspective
show examples
 person visits inaccessible places, there will be policy any
second
.
For example
, people
meets
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meet
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 in the central square and provide their time well,
however
 it is a place where thief and criminals spend their time to theft expensive goods.
Therefore
, police members would be able to control
such
 situations.
In addition
,
government
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the government
show examples
 should take
a
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apply
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control
the
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of the
show examples
 whole system, and
nation
Correct article usage
the nation
show examples
 should lend a hand
for
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to
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 leaders to make a clever and constructed system. People should have to trust
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
CCTV
cameras
,
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apply
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 because it keeps
safety
 citizens life. There is a significant feature of having
cameras
 and one of them is that, if public
safety
 is done,
personal
Correct article usage
the personal
show examples
privacy
 of anyone will
covered
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be covered
show examples
. To sum up,
CCTV
cameras
 are necessary to detect crimes and keep up
safety
Add an article
the safety
show examples
 of citizen’s life and
privacy
.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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