IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Fast food is becoming one part of life everywhere; this has bad effects on our lifestyles and diet. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #part #life #effects #lifestyles #diet
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Nowardays
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Nowadays
 majority of
people
Use synonyms
 are spending of their time at
work
Use synonyms
 more than being at
iregadless
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regardless
 of you are male or female.
This
Linking Words
 is due to economic expenses. Put simply
long
Correct article usage
a long
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 time ago most
woman
Fix the agreement mistake
women
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 never used to go to
work
Use synonyms
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
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therefore
Linking Words
 they used to do all the
choirs
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chores
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 including making
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
homemade
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home made
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homemade
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food
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 and to attend to other needs of the house.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
,hand
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 close relatives used to visit and demonstrate their own cuisines to promote
variety
Add an article
a variety
the variety
show examples
 of
food
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 and taste. For
this
Linking Words
 reason
that is
Linking Words
 why most
people
Use synonyms
 opt for takeaways even though they know
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 unhealthy
practise
Replace the word
practice
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. In
this
Linking Words
essay
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,essay
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i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 am going to agree that majority of
people
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 are in for fast
food
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 due to
people
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hustle
Wrong verb form
hustling
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 to put
food
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 on the table. There is usually nobody at
home
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 to attend to the house
upkeeping
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upkeep
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. I strongly believe
this
Linking Words
 has endangered
people
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's lifestyle medically. A lot of
people
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 have turned to be obese leading to lots of chronic
dieseases
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diseases
 and
forsed
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forced
 to be on
life style
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lifestyle
show examples
 diet.
Conversley
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Conversely
 these
people
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Use synonyms
people
Remove the redundancy
apply
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should hold workshops to campaign for going back to traditional was of preparing
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home made
Correct your spelling
homemade
show examples
food
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 and eating
healthlife
Correct your spelling
health life
healthy life
 style.
People
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 should be encouraged to grow their own organic
food
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 even if it means purchasing them. There should be a duty roaster introduced to balance
work
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 and
home
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. In a
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 the balance of
work
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 and
home
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lifestle
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
 should be equal
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in order
show examples
inorder
Correct your spelling
in order
show examples
 for
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 to stay healthy to reduce medical expenses and to stay healthy.
Submitted by takawirajudith195 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • diabetes
  • heart diseases
  • nutritional deficiency
  • malnutrition
  • convenience
  • nutritional value
  • busy lifestyles
  • balanced meals
  • economic impact
  • lower-income groups
  • healthier alternatives
  • cultural heritage
  • culinary diversity
  • mass production
  • environmental degradation
What to do next:
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