IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

1. Crime rates will fall as advances in technology make it easier to detect and prevent crimes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There has been a lot of buzz around us that the improvement in terms of
technology
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 can reduce the
crime
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rate
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 by improving the detection and identification techniques. I concede with the notion that the implementation of
technology
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 in the
police
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 department system could decrease the chances of
crime
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. There are various points that will justify the stand.
Firstly
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, the advancement in the form of
technology
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 in the
police
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 departments would endow various benefits.
For instance
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, the involvement of
technology
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 benefits law enforcement in
such
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 a way that cops can easily do their work, and it eases the tedious job of the
police
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.
Additionally
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, Nowadays,
police
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 can detect offenders by using various technologies,
such
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 as
,
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apply
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 fingerprint
technology
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, DNA matching, eye retina scanner and voice detector. These technologies provide a vivid view of any investigation.
Secondly
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, the improvement in the way of working of cops by using
technology
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 showed a significant
rate
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 in the reduction of
crime
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 because
criminals
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 cannot run away once they will be under the
technology
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 scanner.
For example
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, if some
crime
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 has been committed, and cops have caught many people for investigation. The investigation team can take the help of advanced approaches to identify the real culprit of any
crime
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.
Moreover
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, a lot of data of
criminals
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 records can be easily accessible to know about the real criminal.
Therefore
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, the higher chances of being caught will create fear among
criminals
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 which will eventually decrease the
crime
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rate
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.
Lastly
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, Conventional approaches to detect and investigate the gangster could not be enough efficient, and, they
also
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 resulted in
the
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apply
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biased decisions from the inquiry agency towards the investigated people.
Finally
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, I believe that advancements in
technology
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 have various positive impacts in investigating
criminals
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 and it leads to the decline of the
crime
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rate
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 which is a positive effect on any society.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crime deterrent
  • high-tech surveillance
  • facial recognition systems
  • omnipresence
  • deter
  • digital forensics
  • ballistic testing
  • revolutionize
  • exonerate
  • root causes
  • social inequality
  • invasion of privacy
  • civil liberties
  • surveillance
  • data collection
  • negative implications
  • cybercrime
  • hacking
  • identity theft
  • online fraud
  • cybersecurity
  • vulnerabilities
  • exploit
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