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Band 4.5

This is a good idea for people to continue working in an old age if it is possible for them do so. Do you agree or disagree?

#idea #people #age
Being an old age worker is a good idea. If it possible that if those
people
 could work on retirement’s
time
,
that is
a
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wonderful for making a good for your free
time
. I completely agree with
this
 notion. Nowadays, many
people
 are getting old. Which is the best way they could lead before the end of life. I understand that the elders must spend their
time
 for the rest. It seems like a special opportunity to get work when being
an
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old age.
Firstly
, those
people
 used to have memories with
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a colleague
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colleague
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colleagues
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 that could
affected
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affect
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 cause make a lot of problems later,
such
 as they might get
a
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depression.
Secondly
, I remembered that my aunt has
effected
Correct your spelling
affected
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 by her experienced
about
Change preposition
of
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this
 retirement’s
time
. Which is made her admission
at
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to
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 the ICU because the depression’s symptom has relapsed. The doctor has diagnosed that she used to work
everyday
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every day
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 and she had a good friendship. It is a reason; it seems like one of
an
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addiction. The doctors have explained about
this
 illness,
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most
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mostly
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most
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people
 reached
this
 problem because it causes of the familiarity.
Lastly
, I think that it sounds
like
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an
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unreasonable but it has
confirmed
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been confirmed
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 from a doctor’s research. I welcomely to give the commentary that being
an
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unemployed
it
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is not easy. As has been noted, I think the life cycle has its rules. Which is you cannot be determined. Working hard all the life, Upon the
time
 Its suddenly must stop. There must be a problem.
Submitted by pairpph on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive decline
  • Mental and emotional well-being
  • Social interaction
  • Financial stability
  • Sense of purpose
  • Self-worth
  • Physical health
  • Skill utilization
  • Experience
  • Flexible working hours
  • Generational gap
  • Elderly individuals
  • Retirement
  • Workplace
  • Economic contribution
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