Many people put their personal information (address, telephone number,...) online for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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It is true that a growing number of
people
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have put their personal details online.
While
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there are undoubtedly dangers in
this
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, I believe that the convenience of putting
such
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data on the internet outweighs the negative aspects. On the one hand, personal
information
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which is held online may be stolen or misused in some way by
cyber criminals
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cybercriminals
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.
For example
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, thanks to advances in technology, online banking is now common.
People
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must trust the security measures put in place by banks and
by
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apply
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companies to ensure that their bank account details are guaranteed to be secure from computer hackers. Strict codes of conduct minimise the dangers but,
in contrast
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, criminals can access all kinds of personal
information
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which
people
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naively provide on social networking sites,
such
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as Facebook or Instagram.
As a result
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, users of these sites may find that they are victims of online scams.
On the other hand
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, the storage of personal
information
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online is convenient in various ways.
Firstly
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, it enables
people
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to pay for goods ordered over the internet,
for instance
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. Time-consuming visits to the shops or the bank have been superseded by simply clicking a computer key.
Secondly
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, sharing personal
information
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on social network sites is one of those socio-economic changes which has revolutionised patterns of behaviour . Friends and family members who have access to the
internet
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Internet
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are able to keep in touch freely and easily.
Thus
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, sharing personal details online for business or pleasure has accelerated the flow of
information
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and is user-friendly, and
therefore
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old ways of doing things have become obsolete. In conclusion, despite the risks of personal online
information
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falling into the wrong hands, I would argue that the convenience of sharing
this
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information
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outweighs these risks.
Submitted by chocolovemint99 on

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task response
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coherence and cohesion
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Personal information
  • Online privacy
  • Security concerns
  • Identity theft
  • Enhanced connectivity
  • Convenient access
  • Social networks
  • Banking purposes
  • Positive development
  • Negative impact
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