Essay: Some people believe that sport in schools is a waste of time and resources, whilst others believe that sport in schools is a vital part of education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sport #schools #waste #time #resources #whilst #part #education

There is no doubt that activities are very important to keep a person healthy and fit. in the

schools

Add a comma

,schools

show examples

sports

are important activity with the

study

to keep fit

phisically

Correct your spelling

physically

and

mentelly

Correct your spelling

mentally

. while other thing

sports

is a waste of

time

in the school and only

education

is important. in

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

will discuss

both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

views and give my opinion . On the one hand, activities

are play

Change the verb form

play

show examples

a vital role for anyone

life

to make the person strong and healthy

therefore

for the

students

Change to a genitive case

student's

students'

show examples

activities are very important with the

study

to keep them energetic because sportsman is always the fighter in any

situaltion

Correct your spelling

situation

for

instance

Add a comma

,instance

show examples

there was a story of a great sportsman Mikha

singh

Change the capitalization

Singh

show examples

he was

indian

Change the capitalization

Indian

show examples

racer and was a great sportsman he made

india

Change the capitalization

India

show examples

proud in international

lavel

Correct your spelling

level

Although

he was not higher educated

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

he was the pride of the nation. because of his

sports

gives you

anergy

Correct your spelling

energy

show examples

to face any situation in

life

On the other hand

, myriad people

beleive

Correct your spelling

believe

that in the schools only

education

is important for the

students

however

education

is play

Change the verb form

plays

show examples

a vital role in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

learning

life

moreover

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

childhood

Add a comma

,childhood

show examples

many kids are very busy in

sports

, they are not

giving

Wrong verb form

given

show examples

proper

time

for studies due to that they are not completing their

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

students

should give

time

study

and

sports

both

. To illustrate there is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

news that so many

students

got failed because they

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

not getting

time

due to the world cup.

thus

students

should get

time

for

study

as well they should play

Correct the article-noun agreement

sports

a sport

show examples

sports

to make them

phisically

Correct your spelling

physically

fit. In my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

believe that

sports

and

education

both

play

Change the article

show examples

important role in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

life

moreover

for any

education

sports

also

a part of our lives to keep our body fit and healthy. To conclude, in the

schools

Change to a genitive case

school's

schools'

show examples

sports

and

education

both

are important and make healthy.

Submitted by chinmay.tandon on Mon Oct 25 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

321 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Physical fitness
Holistic development
Cognitive function
Teamwork
Interpersonal skills
Extracurricular
Academic achievement
Resource allocation
Curriculum
Inequality in opportunities
Life skills
Well-rounded education

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Essay: Some people believe that sport in schools is a waste of time and resources, whilst others believe that sport in schools is a vital part of education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Do the disadvantages of global homogenization outweigh the advantages?

In many countries today, women have full-time jobs. Therefore, it is reasonable to share housework equally between men and women. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that children’s leisure activities must be educational, otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your experience.

Some parents want their children to read only serious educational books at all times. They don’t want their children to read any entertaiment books because they think it is wast of time. Do you agree or disagree?