Essay: Some people believe that sport in schools is a waste of time and resources, whilst others believe that sport in schools is a vital part of education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sport #schools #waste #time #resources #whilst #part #education

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There is no doubt that activities are very important to keep a person healthy and fit. in the

schools

Add a comma

,schools

show examples

sports

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are important activity with the

study

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to keep fit

phisically

Correct your spelling

physically

and

mentelly

Correct your spelling

mentally

. while other thing

sports

Use synonyms

is a waste of

time

Use synonyms

in the school and only

education

Use synonyms

is important. in

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

will discuss

both

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the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

views and give my opinion . On the one hand, activities

are play

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play

show examples

a vital role for anyone

life

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to make the person strong and healthy

therefore

Linking Words

for the

Use synonyms

students

Change to a genitive case

student's

students'

show examples

activities are very important with the

study

Use synonyms

to keep them energetic because sportsman is always the fighter in any

situaltion

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situation

for

Linking Words

instance

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,instance

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there was a story of a great sportsman Mikha

singh

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Singh

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he was

indian

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Indian

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racer and was a great sportsman he made

india

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India

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proud in international

lavel

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level

Although

Linking Words

he was not higher educated

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

he was the pride of the nation. because of his

sports

Use synonyms

sports

Use synonyms

gives you

anergy

Correct your spelling

energy

show examples

to face any situation in

life

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On the other hand

Linking Words

, myriad people

beleive

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believe

that in the schools only

education

Use synonyms

is important for the

students

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however

Linking Words

education

Use synonyms

is play

Change the verb form

plays

show examples

a vital role in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

learning

life

Use synonyms

moreover

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

childhood

Add a comma

,childhood

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many kids are very busy in

sports

Use synonyms

, they are not

giving

Wrong verb form

given

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proper

time

Use synonyms

for studies due to that they are not completing their

Use synonyms

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

students

Use synonyms

should give

time

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study

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and

sports

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both

Use synonyms

. To illustrate there is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

news that so many

students

Use synonyms

got failed because they

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

not getting

time

Use synonyms

due to the world cup.

thus

Linking Words

students

Use synonyms

should get

time

Use synonyms

for

study

Use synonyms

as well they should play

Correct the article-noun agreement

sports

a sport

show examples

sports

Use synonyms

to make them

phisically

Correct your spelling

physically

fit. In my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

believe that

sports

Use synonyms

and

education

Use synonyms

both

Use synonyms

play

Change the article

show examples

important role in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

life

Use synonyms

moreover

Linking Words

for any

education

Use synonyms

sports

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

a part of our lives to keep our body fit and healthy. To conclude, in the

schools

Change to a genitive case

school's

schools'

show examples

sports

Use synonyms

and

education

Use synonyms

both

Use synonyms

are important and make healthy.

Submitted by chinmay.tandon on Mon Oct 25 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

321 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Physical fitness
Holistic development
Cognitive function
Teamwork
Interpersonal skills
Extracurricular
Academic achievement
Resource allocation
Curriculum
Inequality in opportunities
Life skills
Well-rounded education

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Essay: Some people believe that sport in schools is a waste of time and resources, whilst others believe that sport in schools is a vital part of education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Good looking people tend to get hired more easily despite not having very impressive qualifications. Do you agree or disagree with the above statement?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people claim that there should be some fixed guide lines in how to deal or implement changes in an organization, whereas others believe in other approaches to perform these changes. Discuss both of these views and state your own opinion.

Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Is this a positive or negative development?

Many people believe that formal “pen and paper” examinations are not the best method of assessing educational achievements. What is your view of examinations?