IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so protecting them is a waste ofresources.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#animals #place #st #century #waste #ofresources
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people argue that there is no area for wild
animals
Use synonyms
 to live,
thus
Linking Words
 it is useless to protect them. I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 point of view. On the one hand, it is wrong to reckon wild
animals
Use synonyms
 have no place in the 21st century. There are many species living on the earth and we humans have no right to determine the existence of other creatures.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there are no particular needs for us to catch and kill wild
animals
Use synonyms
 in order to feed or accommodate the world’s increasing population because we can adopt some environmental-friendly or sustainable development approaches to meet our needs. Scientists and researchers have already set plenty of conservations to protect some rare wild
animals
Use synonyms
. If we kill all the wild
animals
Use synonyms
, it goes against the idea of harmonious development between man and nature.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is not a waste of resources to provide wild
animals
Use synonyms
 protection while it is essential and useful to protect these valuable and lovely kinds of
animals
Use synonyms
 in fact. Wild
animals
Use synonyms
 take part in the carbon cycle and have a positive effect on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
world climate stability.
For example
Linking Words
, rainforests release oxygen and absorb carbon dioxide and microbes decompose the organic matter into inorganic matters for
Add an article
the plant
a plant
show examples
plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants
show examples
 to use while wild
animals
Use synonyms
 play a role
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 accelerates
this
Linking Words
 significant process. By protecting wild
animals
Use synonyms
 and their habitats, we maintain the natural balance of all life on the earth. In conclusion, I believe we have no right to decide whether or not wild
animals
Use synonyms
 should exist, and we should do everything we can to protect them.
Submitted by 2732806430 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: