IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that using a bicycle as your main form of transport has a lot of advantages whereas others think it has many disadvantages. Discuss both views.

#people #bicycle #form #transport
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Bicycle is considered as the best means of transport. It is frequently assumed that riding a
vehicle
Use synonyms
 has many benefits
while
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 others feel that it
also
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 numerous drawbacks.
This
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 essay will illustrate the positive side of riding the bike and, will
also
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 provide
side
Correct article usage
the side
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 effects of riding the bike. First of all, The main advantage of using a bicycle is that it is convenient to ride, cheap as compared to other motorbikes, and can easily
get
Verb problem
be
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 repaired.
Moreover
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, they have been introduced in the gyms for exercise purposes which helps maintain the cholesterol level of heart diseases
similarly
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, it
also
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 helps in reducing the lower body weight.
While
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 using the cycle, there is irrefutably
reduces
Wrong verb form
reduced
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in
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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air pollution which proportionally decreases
the
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apply
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Global Warming and noise pollution caused
due to
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 heavy motorbikes.
For example
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,
according to
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 the survey, Delhi has reduced its pollution rate from 15% more in two months. Every citizen must observe the beneficial side of cycling and should motivate others. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
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 hand, The major drawback of using it is time management.
one
Capitalize word
One
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 can not operate the
vehicle
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 on
the
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apply
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busy streets and travel for longer distances because the streets may have few lights
due
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apply
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that
Correct word choice
and
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 accidents may occur.
Furthermore
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, they don't have any storage facilities and only a cyclist can sit on it and has to ride it.
For instance
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, By
continuous
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continuously
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 riding a cycle a person can develop osteoporosis in the bones of the knees and joints which may ruin their future. In conclusion, using the bicycle will be more valuable than any other
vehicle
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 because it may decrease the ozone layer depletion of the harmful gases in the atmosphere which may cause serious health diseases like cancer. I conclude that to protect the environment one should utilize a
vehicle
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that is
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 less hazardous to the ecosystem.
Submitted by Sarafasih20 on

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Task Response
Ensure to address both sides of the argument in a balanced manner. Provide more in-depth analysis of the advantages and disadvantages of using a bicycle as the main form of transport.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas more clearly to enhance the overall coherence of the essay. Consider using transition words and phrases to improve the flow between paragraphs and ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-developed, providing a clear overview of the main points.
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