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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Transport delays and long journey times are a widespread phenomenon in many cities today. What are the causes of this problem, and how could the situation be improved?

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Undoubtedly, transportation has become
integral
Change the article
an integral
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 part of urban
cities
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.
However
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,
traffic
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 jams and prolonged
travel
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time
Use synonyms
 is becoming common these days. Increased number of
vehicles
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 and poor
infrastructure
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 could be the main root causes
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 problem. In
this
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 essay, both these issues will be discussed in detail.
Firstly
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, more and more new
vehicles
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 are being added to
town's
Correct article usage
the town's
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traffic
Use synonyms
 due to
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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 in sales of
four-wheeler
Add an article
a four-wheeler
the four-wheeler
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 and
two wheeler
Add a hyphen
two-wheeler
show examples
 companies, which has indeed increased the
traffic
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 jams. Now can
restriction
Fix the agreement mistake
restrictions
show examples
 be imposed to
travel
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 on
public
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the public
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? No,
this
Linking Words
 can be done, but at least we can create
time
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 zones in congested areas of
cities
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 for
movement
Correct article usage
the movement
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 of heavy-commercial
vehicles
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. For an instance, in Delhi,
traffic
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 jams are quite common due to which
administration
Correct article usage
the administration
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 has stopped the movement of load-carry
vehicles
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 to pass through
city
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the city
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 after 7 a.m. and before 11 p.m.
This
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 has eased the pressure on
traffic
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 within the city.
Hence
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,
by
Change preposition
apply
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stopping the large
vehicles
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 for
certain
Correct article usage
a certain
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time
Use synonyms
 period tends to curb the issue of long
travel
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time
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 within the
cities
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 which has become common due to
increasing
Correct article usage
the increasing
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 number of
vehicles
Use synonyms
 on
Use synonyms
road
Correct article usage
the road
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 day by day.
Secondly
Linking Words
, poor
road
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infrastructure
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 has led to delay during
travel
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. Narrow and broken roads handling
traffic
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 movement more than
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 capacity are common these days.
Moreover
Linking Words
, if parking facilities are limited, people are bound to park their
vehicles
Use synonyms
 on sides of
Use synonyms
road
Add an article
the road
show examples
 which is causing
major
Add an article
the major
a major
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 issue of
traffic
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 in
cities
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.
Road
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 to airport in Jaipur city perfectly exemplifies
this
Linking Words
 scenario where
this
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 old bitumen
road
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 had developed cracks and it was not wide enough to absorb the
traffic
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. Due to increasing people's complaints
last
Linking Words
 year new cemented
road
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 and exclusive parking building were built and
new
Add an article
the new
a new
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road
Use synonyms
 is wide enough to solve the problem of unnecessary delays.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
infrastructure
Use synonyms
 is the key factor
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 decides whether one faces
travel
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 issues or not. To conclude, ever-increasing
vehicles
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 on
road
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 and poor
infrastructure
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has
Change the verb form
have
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 created
devastating
Add an article
a devastating
the devastating
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 effect on
traffic
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 issues.
Therefore
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,
solution
Add an article
the solution
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 lies in
Correct article usage
the
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amendment of
traffic
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 rules and
construction
Correct article usage
the construction
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 of
healthy
Replace the word
health
show examples
infrastructure
Use synonyms
.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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