IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Space exploration cost the tax payer an exorbitant amount of money each year.What are the advantages and disadvantages of spending money on space exploration

#space #exploration #cost #tax #payer #amount #money #year
It is argued that planetary
exploration
 has made members of the public
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
dig deep into their pockets annually in terms of remitting tax.
This
space
exploration
 has some merits and demerits.
To begin
 with,planet adventure has the benefit of finding certain minerals that could not be found on earth
thus
 providing an added advantage to the state involved.
This
 help in improving the mineral stock available to them.
Furthermore
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
exploration
 is relevant to the current technology where
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
certain inventions can be determined with the aim of improving the well-being of individuals.
For example
,
exploration
 on the satellite disks in
space
 to speed up the world technology.
Thus
,
this
exploration
 is relevant to finding the essential minerals and
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
improving the technology.
This
exploration
 has got challenges.
Firstly
,the life of the astronauts
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 at risk because
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
 is not habitable.
Also
,hazards related to travelling pose danger to individuals who are involved in the
exploration
.
Secondly
,the impact after
exploration
 is minimal that much can not be felt by developing countries and
also
 the taxpayer does not feel the impact apart from exorbitant
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money from them. In summary,the amount of money spent on
space
exploration
 should be diverted to relevant projects which have a
positve
Correct your spelling
positive
 impact on the citizens rather than having it on
space
exploration
Submitted by Sabina Hamisi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: