Many people spend a lot of money on clothes, haircuts, and beauty products to enhance their appearance. Some people think that it is a good way to spend money, while others think that there is a better way to spend it. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is argued whether spending
personal
budget on gaining a good Correct article usage
a personal
appearance
through clothing, hairstyles and cosmetic products is beneficial or people
should allocate their Correct word choice
whether people
money
in other better ways. Although
expenditure on enhancing one’s physical attractiveness is worth it, I am still more convinced that it would be better if people
channel their financial budget into other useful purposes.
On the one hand, some people
advocate the view that it is necessary for everyone to spend money
on fashion, haircuts and beauty products since having an attractive look can give people
more confidence and good chances in their life
. In fact, Fix the agreement mistake
lives
people
nowadays are living in a world full of judgements and prejudices, so those with a beautiful or handsome face and a personal style of clothes and haircuts can easily leave good impressions on others. This
can be exemplified by an interview that one’s outside appearance
can be one of the most impressive things with recruiters. Besides
, with good preparation in terms of outfits and look
, candidates can express themselves in a confident and unique way, which brings them a higher possibility of being employed.
Correct subject-verb agreement
looks
On the other hand
, I hold a firm belief that people
had better allocate their money
for other purposes on account of several reasons. First of all, I strongly believe that when people
put too much emphasis on enhancing their appearance
, they are likely to be more materialistic. To be more specific, they can be obsessed and pressured by trying to appear with the perfect look. As a result
, they can become fashion slaves and make impulsive purchases on
clothes or cosmetics products. Change preposition
of
Instead
, they can use their money
for self-development through
registering for a new skill course or Change preposition
by
going
travelling to other countries, Verb problem
apply
for example
. By doing so, they can expand their knowledge, gain hands-on experiences and have great opportunities to enjoy their life, which seems to be a good value for money
.
In conclusion, I cannot deny the importance of investing money
in improving people
’s appearance
, yet I still strongly support the view that there are better ways for people
to spend their budget and gain more significant benefits in terms of self-improvement.Submitted by tungpns1811 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence and cohesion
Well-balanced presentation of both views with clear examples.
task achievement
Clear position and effectively addressed both views.