In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

#cultures #children #message

In some cultures,

kids

are often told that in order to achieve something, it would reflect

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their hard work. Teaching

children

this

would certainly benefit them in many ways,

however

, there will

also

be some drawbacks.

This

essay will address both positive and negative aspects that have an effect on

children

. On the one hand,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

encouraging a child to be passionate

first

such

an effective strategy. In consequence, those

kids

would learn to be more responsible and try hard on something they wanted to achieve or

success

Replace the word

succeed

show examples

. To illustrate,

kids

would realize that it would be impossible to pass an exam without studying or being well-prepared. An additional advantage is that it would reflect on a kid’s future.The case in point is that if

this

strategy was taught to

kids

since they were young,

this

would obviously make them grow up to be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

disciplined

kid

Fix the agreement mistake

kids

show examples

and have high responsibility.

However

on the other hand

this

could be a source of a serious cause of stress. In each household,

children

are taught differently by their parents. Some parents might be too strict and scold their

kids

that they did not try hard enough and are linked to their failure.

This

will definitely increase

Change preposition

apply

show examples

tension and stress. Teaching

children

to improve and make them learn from their mistakes is

also

important because if they failed, it does not mean that they did not try their best. In conclusion, I would once again reaffirm that teaching

children

with

this

strategy offers both beneficial and disadvantageous perspectives.

Therefore

, it is essential that parents encourage and understand their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

in the right way by not discouraging or pressuring them to be successful.

This

would be a powerful tool

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for a

show examples

kid to succeed.

Submitted by aiko.utaka on Wed Nov 03 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

293 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

achieve
try hard
positive mindset
self-belief
motivates
ambitious goals
resilience
determination
confidence
self-esteem
growth mindset
unrealistic expectations
disappointment
failure
effort
hard work
seek support
individual differences
abilities
capabilities

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In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Too much emphasis is placed on education. More government money should be spent on providing free-time activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many employees can now do their work from home using modern technology. However, this change may only benefit workers, not the employers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The two pictures show the transformation of a city. Summarize the information in 150 words.

It is often said that we live today in a “throwaway society” in which people buy things and soon after throw them away. What are the causes of the “throwaway society”? What problems could the “throwaway society” create?

Governments should spend money on railways rather than Roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?