IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

With The Increasing Use And Development Of New Technology, Many Machine Are New Able To Do The Work Which People Used To Perform. What Are The Advantages And Disadvantages Of This Trend ?

#development #technology #machine #work #people #trend
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
21st
Correct article usage
the 21st
show examples
decades
Fix the agreement mistake
decade
show examples
, many
industries
Use synonyms
 have planned to introduce new
technology
Use synonyms
 in their
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
workplaces
show examples
work places
Correct your spelling
workplaces
show examples
 and bulging of people can be replaced by technological
machines
Use synonyms
 . Whereas
this
Linking Words
 trend is beneficial for only those who manage their
work
Use synonyms
 and on the other
side
Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
 may be affecting on the
workers
Use synonyms
 who fully
relays
Change the verb form
relay
show examples
 on it . In
further
Linking Words
 paragraphs,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 and disadvantages of
this
Linking Words
 trend.
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the Beginning , it is beneficial for every
Use synonyms
companies
Change to a singular noun
company
show examples
 which
produces
Change the verb form
produce
show examples
Use synonyms
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 and
selling
Wrong verb form
sells
show examples
 out.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
companies
Use synonyms
 manager releases
Change the article
the
show examples
main headache from
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 mind to getting bulge of
workers
Use synonyms
. Technological
Use synonyms
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
 replace
worker
Correct article usage
the worker
show examples
side
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, now
small
Change the article
a small
the small
show examples
 number of
workers
Use synonyms
 can produce
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
 amount of
Use synonyms
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 with help of
machines
Use synonyms
. It may
be save
Change the verb form
save
show examples
companies
Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
 and they use it
into
Change preposition
on
show examples
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
side
Use synonyms
 of development
companies
Use synonyms
 like infrastructure ,
internal
Add an article
the internal
show examples
 design of company which attracts
Add an article
the customer
show examples
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, The main issue of
company
Correct article usage
the company
show examples
 solved
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is time
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
produce
Wrong verb form
producing
show examples
Use synonyms
product
Correct article usage
the product
show examples
.
Machines
Use synonyms
 can make
Use synonyms
Add an article
a product
show examples
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 within
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 seconds.
For example
Linking Words
,
Technology
Use synonyms
 is
also
Linking Words
 introduced in farming
industries
Use synonyms
 and every
farmers
Change to a singular noun
farmer
show examples
 can use that
technology
Use synonyms
. Farmers use
Use synonyms
Add an article
the machine
show examples
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 cut the corps without
put
Wrong verb form
putting
show examples
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
show examples
human kind
Correct your spelling
humankind
show examples
affort
Correct your spelling
effort
afford
. Government can give all
technology
Use synonyms
 to
Add an article
the farmer
a farmer
show examples
farmer
Fix the agreement mistake
farmers
show examples
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
Correct article usage
a
show examples
reasonable price.
Lastly
Linking Words
, it can be overall help to boost
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
 economic power because
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
 of
GDP
Correct article usage
the GDP
show examples
 portion is taken by
export
Add an article
the export
show examples
 industry.
Machines
Use synonyms
 make
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
 amount of
product
Use synonyms
 in less time
then
Linking Words
 export it into surrounding counties and ultimately it grows economy of that country. On the other
side
Use synonyms
, there are very less disadvantages but
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can very
Correct your spelling
effective
show examples
affective
Correct your spelling
effective
show examples
 for
workers
Use synonyms
.
First
Linking Words
, poverty is
main
Add an article
the main
a main
show examples
 concern for every nation and it will increase day by day.
Companies
Use synonyms
now
Add a missing verb
are now
show examples
maily
Correct your spelling
mainly
 focused on
machines
Use synonyms
 rather
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
workers
Use synonyms
. Ultimately, it can affect
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
workers
Use synonyms
 who earn
money
Use synonyms
 through their
work
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
Machine
Use synonyms
 can damage some time and
compunies
Correct your spelling
companies
 pay very huge amount of
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 repair
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. Maintenance cost is very high and every month small portion of
Use synonyms
money
Add an article
the money
show examples
 goes for repair.
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
 conclusion,
technology
Use synonyms
 has very beneficial for better development but
companies
Use synonyms
 can get
work
Use synonyms
Change preposition
for those
show examples
those worker
Change the determiner
that worker
those workers
show examples
 who really
need
Correct pronoun usage
itneed
show examples
. Some
industries
Use synonyms
 can not run on
Use synonyms
Add an article
a machine
the machine
show examples
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
 and they need
man made
Add a hyphen
man-made
show examples
 staff. so,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should get
Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
show examples
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
 for
workers
Use synonyms
 and let them know about
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 kind of
industries
Use synonyms
 where
human kind
Correct your spelling
humankind
show examples
force
Fix the agreement mistake
forces
show examples
 need.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: