IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Tourism is an ever growing industry. What benefits do you think tourism brings to individuals and society?

#tourism #industry #individuals #society
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Many factors are part of the
country
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 economy, one of these factors is tourism.
This
Linking Words
 activity is one of the greatest economical activities that
helps
Change the verb form
help
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 the
country
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's
incomes
Fix the agreement mistake
income
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. Tourism always brings benefits for society and individuals, because
this
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 type of industry demands a big quantity of services
such
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 as transportation, accommodation, food, goods consumption, services.
Therefore
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, it helps to develop other types of working activities around them. Many people can work even though a particular person does not have a profession or is a specialist, that person can start
in
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at
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 a low level and by obtaining experience, could become an expert. Nowadays, it is common that people not only look for beach-destination vacations, but visitors
also
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 want to live well-experienced travel.
That is
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 the reason why many sites or places that offer
this
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 kind of experience are growing so fast,
for example
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, glamping travels.
That is
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 a mix between camping in a beautiful landscape and luxury services,
such
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 as having a bed and an individual shower; without suffering the mosquito's bites. Tourism not only helps with economical incomes
,
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apply
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 but
also
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 to spread the word of the
country
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's attractions for others to visit. These recommendations help to increase the number of people who want to experience the same trip. The continuous travellers' visits ensure jobs for the community and benefit everybody. In conclusion, it is an important activity to develop in any
country
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 and represents good incomes,
furthermore
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, it gives information about the specific place or
country
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.
Linking Words
Moreover
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,Moreover
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 we can see a transformation in the actual travels people’s needs and how the industry is transforming. The good news is that
this
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 sector will never end and will ensure jobs.
Submitted by salmaraz on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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