SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY WHERE MONEY AND POSSESSIONS ARE GIVEN TOO MUCH IMPORTANCE. OTHERS BELIEVE THAT THIS IS IMPROVING OUR LIVES. DISCUSS BOTH THESE VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION.

#people #society #money #possessions #importance #lives

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Today many believe that we are living in a place,where there is an importance for financing and reputation.

However

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,others say that financial persistence can improve our situation. In

this

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essay,I will discuss both sides and give the necessary opinion. On the one hand, some believe that we are living in a place, where there is a vital role for money and goodwill.

For instance

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, giving value for finance,house and getting fame in the organisation because it is the most essential to exist in the world.

Secondly

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, the public

also

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gives more time to

getting

Change the form of the verb

get

show examples

a good job position and wanted to fulfil their financial status.

For example

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,buying shares from sharemarket,investment planning.

However

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,these are the primary resources in everyone's life.

Lastly

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,giving importance for monetary benefit is not only the way but there are some other goals

such

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as better relationships with partner,family and friends plays a key role because it is very essential in our lives rather than finance and high-level positions.

On the other hand

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,everybody needed to struggle in society,and earn bread and butter to live a better life because

this

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is the primary goal and it can be fulfilled, when they do hard work and entitle the position in which they are interested.

Moreover

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,financial planning is very essential for future reasons. Even today,starting from the initial age to the younger generation everyone needs money, For

this

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,reason youngsters are doing jobs simultaneously with continuing education.

For instance

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,part-time jobs in many restaurants and doing labour jobs.

However

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this

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is the positive development in career pathways and endeavouring the job title position. To conclude, to live a better lifestyle earning money is essential to everyone because it gives food,shelter and many auspicious things in our life.

However

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,too much expectancy towards the financial status leads to downsides in personal relationships because the persons are more goal-oriented.

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10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
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Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
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Grammar mistakes
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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

304 words

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SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY WHERE MONEY AND POSSESSIONS ARE GIVEN TOO MUCH IMPORTANCE. OTHERS BELIEVE THAT THIS IS IMPROVING OUR LIVES. DISCUSS BOTH THESE VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION.

Maintaining public libraries is a waste of money since computer technology can replace their functions. Do you agree or disagree?

Private car ownership has been increasing over the past few decades. This has given ordinary people greater mobility, but has also led to concerns about traffic congestion and air pollution. Do the advantages of private car ownership outweigh the disadvantages?

The funds for postgraduate research are limited; therefore some people think that the government should provide financial support. In their opinion, only scientific research should be funded, rather than other less useful subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. Why is this the case? What can be done to solve this problem?

A country becomes more interesting and develop more quickly when its population includes a mixture of nationalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?