This
 days many  Linking Words
products
 are high-calorie due to a large amount of sugar. A substantial number of detrimental diseases Use synonyms
such
 as obesity and diabetes are attributed to the consumption of sugar .many Linking Words
people
 claim that to control  Use synonyms
this
 devastating effect, the government should impose higher prices on sugary foods and drink. Despite the fact thatLinking Words
,
 Remove the comma
apply
this
 approach can be effective somehow, I believe the more efficient method should be taken to control the devastating effect of high-sugar food.
Putting more price on foods that contain sugar has several merits; Linking Words
first
 of all, it would act as a deterrent on purchasing Linking Words
Linking Words
this 
Change the determiner
this product
these products
products
. Use synonyms
For example
, Linking Words
people
 in the middle-social class, because of their limitation in the budget are more affected by Use synonyms
this
 policy. In other world, Linking Words
People
 to manage their expenses would buy less harmful Use synonyms
products
 like  soft drinks because these are dispensable for the main diet. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, Linking Words
people
 can control their craving for  sweet ingredients.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, despite imposing higher prices for sugary food and drink, the rate of selling Linking Words
Linking Words
this
 snacks is still at a conspicuous level. One of the overriding reasons for Correct determiner usage
these
this
 is, Linking Words
people
 awareness about a healthy lifestyle is alarmingly low, Use synonyms
thus
 Linking Words
people
 will proceed with their previous regime without considering the inflation on Use synonyms
this
 kind of Linking Words
Use synonyms
products
. Fix the agreement mistake
product
This
 is the main reason for experiencing the debilitating disease namely obesity, eye disease and diabetes. It is imperative for the government rather than just making Linking Words
this
 sort of food expensive, to focus on raising awareness of Linking Words
people
 about alternative healthy diets, boosting the general health of Use synonyms
people
 and decreasing the chance of catching illnesses.
To conclude, Use synonyms
in contrast
 to attitude claiming the government and manufacturer, should exert more value on sugary foods, which can deter Linking Words
people
 from purchasing these, I firmly opine that Use synonyms
this
 way is not the only means, Linking Words
Linking Words
moreover
 there are more practical and liable measures like inform society about alternative healthy lifestyle, driving to a more positive result.Add a comma
,moreover