In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

As obesity has been
an
Change the article
a
show examples
wide problem mainly
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the most developed countries, some governments are considering
to improve
Change the verb form
improving
show examples
the
taxes
applied on junk
food
, in
order
to make
people
avoid its
consumation
Correct your spelling
consumption
consummation
. Personally, I strongly disagree with that statement, since
this
is not going to be a solution for
this
matter. At
first
, it is important to
considerate
Replace the word
consider
show examples
that individuals must be able to choose whatever they want to consume, even if their choice is not the best for their health. Living
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
a
democrate
Correct your spelling
democratic
place means,
Correct your spelling
overall
show examples
over all
Correct your spelling
overall
show examples
, giving
people
equal rights to do anything they want, as much as it does not
interfer
Correct your spelling
interfere
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
other's
people
choices.
This
Government suggestion would correspond as stopping selling meats in the boucheries, in
order
to impose
people
to turn vegetarians and,
consequently
, help the
reducion
Correct your spelling
reduction
of
methano
Correct your spelling
methane
methanol
in the air and, as well, decrease pollutions rate to the world, in a global
perspection
Correct your spelling
perspective
, while in another hand would contribute to
people
's health as an individual instance, which is a
completly
Correct your spelling
completely
insane idea.
Furthermore
, whereas for some
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
show examples
processed
food
might be a
non satisfactory
Add a hyphen
non-satisfactory
show examples
choice for some individuals, it would mean to be the only resource for others. It is explained because junk
food
as mac and cheese,
for example
, usually is way cheaper than buying proteins,
as
Replace the word
like
show examples
rice and beans, from the
market place
Correct your spelling
marketplace
show examples
.
Through
Change preposition
From
show examples
this
point of view, increasing
taxes
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
those unhealthy items would only become a bigger problem for
society
, since probably there would be more starving
people
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
streets
Correct article usage
the streets
show examples
, without anything to eat in
order
to survive, which
also
could increase homeless and violence rates. So on, indeed, it still would not be a solution for the obesity problem. It must be
considerated
Correct your spelling
considered
that the rush on somebody's routine, summed at the way those GMO
food
save
people
's time, mainly on business
week days
Correct your spelling
weekdays
show examples
and its delightful flavour, will do contribute to
this
kind of
majoraty
Correct your spelling
majority
consumption.
Therefore
,
instead
of taking off the possibility of acquiring
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
of products, it would be more
effectively
Replace the word
effective
show examples
, as a Government Policy, to buzz up lectures and advertising, in
order
to teach
people
how to get
organyzed
Correct your spelling
organized
and
concious
Correct your spelling
conscious
about what they digest and how high calories in those foods could be resulting, in the near future, in hearth diseases and be a bad choice for their health, as sides effects of its consumption. In summary, as already exposed above, increasing
taxes
will definitely not contribute to
make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
people
avoid junk
food
, as it will not be a resourceful way of reducing obesity
taxes
in
society
.
This
idea would only bring more issues to the
society
and its Government, but would
also
not be solving the real
society
's obese situation.
Submitted by croonf on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • obesity
  • diabetes
  • heart disease
  • health outcomes
  • healthcare costs
  • consumer behavior
  • socio-economic backgrounds
  • ethical implications
  • public health campaigns
  • subsidies
  • regulations
  • nutritional content
  • healthier food options
  • government intervention
What to do next:
Look at other essays: