Some people believe that what children watch on television influences their behaviour. Others say that amount of time spent watching television influences ther behaviour. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #television #influences #behaviour #amount #time

The link between television and

children

's behaviour has a strong connection. Some people think that the

content

programming impacts

children

's attitude while others believe that, unlike the

content

, how much

time

spent viewing

affects

children

's behaviour.

This

essay will discuss both these points of view and argue in favour of the latter. There is no doubt that the wrong type of television

content

can do damage to young people

therefore

it is important to figure out what

shows are appropriate for

children

. Unquestionably, some

programming depicts risky behaviours which lead to behavioural problems, nightmares and sleeping difficulty

Change preposition

show examples

children

For example

, programs that portray violence can cause aggressive acts.

Furthermore

, young kids are particularly frightened by scary and violent images so that they may think that something bad will happen to them or fear that the world is scary.

On the other hand

, too much

time

to spend watching

also

can be a bad thing. A considerable portion of

children

time

is spent in front of the

, and it definitely shapes their personality and attitude.Spending more than four hours in front of the

per day has a significant negative effect on

children

's way of exploring, playing and interacting.

In addition

to that, it

also

has potentially harmful effects on their brain development which is why parents should put

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time

restrictions on

. In my opinion, both

content

and

time

spent on

Change the verb form

are

show examples

equally important on

children

's ways of action and parents should control the use of

and monitor the

content

of programming in order to raise physically and mentally healthy

children

Submitted by nazliseydakorkmaz on Fri Nov 12 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that what children watch on television influences their behaviour. Others say that amount of time spent watching television influences ther behaviour. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

many people think that university should teach students the real knowledge that comes from practice . Do you agree or disagree

There seems to be an increasing number of serious crimes committed each year. While some think the best way is to use the death penalty as a deterrent, many believe that other measures will be needed. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.