IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discus both these views and give your own opinion.

#sports #professionals #money #people #professions #discus
Some athletes, mostly the professional ones, have massive contracts which bring them a significant profit more than other impressive jobs. While some people argue that it is unfair and illogical, others believe it is entirely justified.
This
 essay will examine both points of view to clarify the reasons for these thoughts. On one side, we have sports lovers whose has an excessive interest in
this
 area. They may drive hundreds of miles just for watching a two hours game of their favourite teams.
This
 group claim sportsman is entirely qualified for receiving a high salary because they are one in a kind. They believe athletes have remarkable physical capabilities that make them unique.
Furthermore
, we should not forget the media's role in
this
 assumption.
For example
, it can be seen that sometimes the media perform a demagogue to show a player importance or value more than its actual worth. On the opposite side, we have people who look at sport as a hobby. The primary argument they put forward is that we are investing in an unnecessary industry and spending much money on it. At the same time, some other sectors like public medical care or environmental programs suffer from a lack of budget. Another vital argument has social aspects more than anything.
For instance
, how is it possible to persuade kids to go to school when they see numerous differences between an athlete's income and a noble prize winner? To sum up, both groups' arguments may seem reasonable on some points. But I firmly believe we should change our attitude and reduce sport professionals' income in favour of social goods.
Submitted by bigblackbear1996 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: