Scientists and technology experts seem to be more valued by modern society than musicians and artists. To what extent do you agree?

Nowadays, many societies believe that the rewarding for
technology
specialists is higher than musicians and artists. From my point of view, I agree with
this
statement for many reasons. In the following essay, the reasons to support my opinion will be outlined in detail.
To begin
with, It is obvious that we live in the computer age
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
revolution is always happening. Since
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
globalization needs
technology
to drive forward in every industry sector. The position of the technologist is noticeable to devise cutting-edge innovation for leisurely living for the world population.
Moreover
, the graduates from
science
Correct article usage
the science
show examples
field are limited, these occupations are required in many organizations,
for example
,
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
technology companies
a technology company
show examples
technology
companies, advanced industrial manufacturers and medical companies.
As a result
, the income for people in these fields
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
tremendous high. After that,
technology
can replace many occupations within a decade. Many jobs are disrupted by artificial intelligence
such
as vehicle drivers, receptionists and teachers.
Although
, art and music can heal many patients in terms of mental illness,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
they will be replaced by artificial intelligence as well since the masterpieces in music and art can be created by artificial intelligence referred to famous art in the past. In conclusion, I strongly agree with
this
viewpoint since it seems to me that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
societies are
give
Wrong verb form
giving
show examples
more interest in technologists and scientists than artists and musicians during the computer age.
Submitted by pang on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • valued
  • modern society
  • scientists
  • technology experts
  • musicians
  • artists
  • reliance
  • scientific advancements
  • practical benefits
  • driving economic growth
  • daily lives
  • culture
  • human emotions
  • express ideas
  • provoke thought
  • spiritual well-being
  • emotional well-being
  • preserving cultural heritage
  • subjective nature
  • diversity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: