IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people say that the increasing business and cultural contact between countries is a positive development, while others think that many countries will lose their national identities as a result. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

In
contemporary
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the contemporary
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 world, globalization is a worldwide tendency.
Although
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 some
individuals’
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individuals
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reliance
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rely
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 on the merits of
this
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, others are
skeptical
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sceptical
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 about it. I will examine both sides before the final conclusion is drawn. On the one hand,
integration
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 can fuel the development of
economy
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the economy
an economy
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.
This
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 is because when
the
Correct article usage
apply
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countries
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 all around the world maintain the interaction, the
potentials
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potential
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 of each country can be identified and made use of.
For example
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, as
Viet Nam
Correct your spelling
Vietnam
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 and the USA keep a friendly relationship, the investment between
two
Correct article usage
the two
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countries
Use synonyms
 can be stable, leading to the economic prosperity of both
countries
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.
Moreover
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, globalization may open up avenues for cultural exchange.
As a result
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, dwellers from different
countries
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 can widen their understanding
about
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of
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 other
countries
Use synonyms
’ values,
consequently
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, it will fortify the unity between different nations.
Hence
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, it is obvious that
integration
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 poses numerous benefits.
On the other hand
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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business and cultural contact can
also
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 make the country run the risk of losing national traditions.
This
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 is to say, currently, youngsters in many Eastern
countries
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 are biased towards the Western culture but forgetting the values of national heritages, or even criticize the traditions of their nations, resulting
the
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in the
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 deterioration of patriotism.
Furthermore
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,
integration
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 is likely to cause horrendous problems for some developing
countries
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 if they depend excessively on developed
countries
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’
investment
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investments
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.
Consequently
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, some developing
countries
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 will lose their financial independence,
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as
Correct word choice
and as
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 a result, the will be instability of
world’s
Correct article usage
the world’s
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 economic state.
Thus
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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globalization can not be seen as entirely positive.
To conclude
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, despite the fact that
integration
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 and interaction between
countries
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 still
holds
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hold
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 some demerits, I totally subscribe to the notion that the upsides of
this
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 tendency always surpass the downsides.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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