Some education systems make students focus on certain subjects at the age of 15, while others require students to study a wide range of subjects until they leave school. What are the benefits of each system? Which do you think is a better educational system?

#education #systems #students #focus #subjects #age #study #range #school #system

Currently, the educational curriculum has always been a topic of interest. While some claim that a few systems allow

students

to specialize in several

subjects

at 15 years old, others make a statement that

students

are required to absorb

knowledge

Add an article

the knowledge

show examples

of many

subjects

until they graduate. There are advantages in both systems,

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

I believe that studying a certain subject is better for

students

. It is irrefutable to note that learning limited

subjects

has brought tremendous benefits for

students

. Having certain

subjects

to study, learners can have more time for different activities,

such

as doing sports or learning a new skill rather than those that study many.

Hence

they are less likely to suffer from stress and can learn more productively at school. Specifically, when

students

can choose to learn the

subjects

they yearn for, they will be dedicated to those aspects and willing to explore more about them.

Consequently

, learning specialized

subjects

has a more effective influence on

students

However

, studying a wide range of

subjects

also

plays a significant role in

students

’ life. As when they absorb diverse insightful knowledge, they can develop comprehensively in a wealth of areas,which will enable them to have a multi-dimensional viewpoint about life.

For instance

, with some

students

who learn various

subjects

ranging from Mathematics to Literature, their horizons will broaden substantially.

Therefore

, studying many

subjects

can provide

students

Add the preposition

with a

show examples

solid foundation before moving to university. In conclusion,

although

each educational system has its own advantages, I would consider learning particular

subjects

to be a more decent system for

students

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Mon Nov 15 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some education systems make students focus on certain subjects at the age of 15, while others require students to study a wide range of subjects until they leave school. What are the benefits of each system? Which do you think is a better educational system?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that all wild animals should be protected. Others say that few wild animals should be protected instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that older employees contribute most to the success of a company. Others think that younger people play a more vital role. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that old buildings should be knocked down and give way to the new buildings. To what extent do you agree or disagree? How important are old buildings?

People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns?