Teenagers should never be put in prison with adults no matter how serious their crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Young
people
Use synonyms
should be separated from older humans in jill regardless of their dangerous habits. In my point of view strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
statement.The reason why I agree with
is
Correct pronoun usage
this is
show examples
that teenagers can learn a bad manner from others and may contribute to a higher risk for them,
also
Linking Words
every age group has a different mindset so they cannot understand each other. On one way , political rules play a fondemantel role in decreasing the effects of the problems .That is why the police
design
Wrong verb form
designed
show examples
a specific place for killers under 18. In
this
Linking Words
place , many things happen which is suitable for their age.
Also
Linking Words
, when we join the oldest
people
Use synonyms
with the teenagers
this
Linking Words
may sour the crime because the
adult
Fix the agreement mistake
adults
show examples
may
by teaching
Wrong verb form
teach
show examples
them violence in the future.
For example
Linking Words
, my friend did not reach 20 years old and one day he
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
an accident in a car and
when
Rephrase
apply
show examples
the police put them in the jill because he
does
Wrong verb form
did
show examples
not have a
driving
Change noun form
driver's
show examples
license. The policemen put him in a separate building far away from the older human.
However
Linking Words
, in each stage of our ,life we share special thoughts which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
appropriate for our levels. So it is difficult to communicate with experienced
people
Use synonyms
who lived before us unless we live with them.
Thus
Linking Words
, the authorities of our country decide on having two places in prisons for
people
Use synonyms
under18
Correct your spelling
under 18
and up to 70. To illustrate that some teenagers have a simple crime so when they attach a strong reaction from the older one they may learn a much more from their bad behaviour. In conclusion, prison should separate
people
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
their age and not care about the risks of their behaviours. I truly agree with
this
Linking Words
idea because it will rocket the
risky
Replace the word
risk
show examples
and it will enhance the youngest
people
Use synonyms
to show unrespected manner to others.
Submitted by alghafryhna on

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task response
Ensure that your response directly addresses the task given. Support your views with specific examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay lacks overall coherence. Make sure to organize your ideas logically and use cohesive devices such as transition words and linking phrases to connect your ideas.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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