In some parts of the world it is becoming popular to research the history of one's own family why my triple want to do this is it a positive or negative development ?

#parts #world #research #history #development

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the importance of history to know the value of the background was always debatable

has

Correct word choice

and has

show examples

now become more controversial with many people claiming that it is beneficial

while

Linking Words

others reject the notion.The substantial influence of

this

Linking Words

trend has sparked controversy over

the

Change the word

its

show examples

potential impact in recent years. The given statements

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

definitely a positive development

due to

Linking Words

the factors discussed in the subsequent paragraphs. Analysing the statement and explaining

further

Linking Words

,the first and foremost reason behind

this

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is that

parents

Use synonyms

are aware of their

children

Use synonyms

to discuss the past of their family and it totally depends on the upbringing of the

children

Use synonyms

. With the help of

this

Linking Words

youngsters

bonding

Wrong verb form

bond

show examples

towards their

parents

Use synonyms

for

Change preposition

show examples

become stronger and

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

feel proud

toward

Change preposition

show examples

their family.

Parents

Use synonyms

tell their

children

Use synonyms

about

Change preposition

that

show examples

they have gotten a lot of Fame in the past because of their reputation in society and

they

Correct word choice

because they

show examples

were very down to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

earth. So,

this

Linking Words

is the reason why

children

Use synonyms

respect their tribes so they learn from their elders.Another striking benefit in

this

Linking Words

regard is that they learn

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

everything from their ancestors.So, they can gain better knowledge from their Past weather related to the mistakes which would help them in future and they will share it with their generation

also

Linking Words

However

Linking Words

, there are some pitfalls that negate these arguments,and which can certainly overwhelm the potential influence of

this

Linking Words

point but one of the most alarming ones is that youngsters were feeling proud related to their family backgrounds. Meanwhile, their superior nature will affect society and they can judge anyone which would isolate them from society.

Besides

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

apply

show examples

their dream of doing new things is not fulfilled

due to

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the pressure of their

parents

Use synonyms

and they can lose their self-confidence and their focus on their goal is no more.

Hence

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, it is apparent why many are against

this

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trend.

To conclude

Linking Words

according to

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the arguments aforementioned above one can reach the conclusion, that the benefits of the historical background of the family are instrumental indeed.

Nevertheless

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, its potential drawback should not be overlooked either.

Submitted by naresh on Wed Nov 17 2021

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Task Achievement

The essay addresses some aspects of the topic, but there is a lack of clarity and coherence in the response.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay demonstrates a reasonable level of coherence and organization, but there are areas where the connection between ideas could be strengthened for better flow.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

339 words

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In some parts of the world it is becoming popular to research the history of one's own family why my triple want to do this is it a positive or negative development ?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their families and friends. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people are afraid to leave their homes because of their fear of crime. Some people believe that more actions should be taken to prevent crime, but others feel that little can be done. Discuss both views and give you.

Logging of the rain forests is a serious problem that may lead to the extinction of animal life. What are the causes of deforestation and what can be done to reduce its dangers?

Some children spend every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Topic: robots and AI technology are increasing being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?