IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many criminals commit further crimes as soon as they released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What possible solutions can you suggest?

#criminals #crimes #prison
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is an increasing trend in the number of society being held in jail as many criminals re-offend. There are many who believe that confinement is less effective than in the past and the amount of people who can embark on something is low. In my opinion, there are several reasons why criminals relapse into crime after being released back into the population. Bias amongst the general public is likely a barrier stopping the ex-criminals from properly integrating back into the community. There is a fact that almost all normal people limit contact with the lawbreakers, which can cause ex-convicts to turn to crime. Lack of skills or certificates will restrict the chance of rehabilitation. In reality, the workplace is competitive and under the effect of Covid-19, it seems to be a challenge for law-abiding citizens and offenders who want to join the labour market. The problem will be only tackled when the politicians combine with the community to support the ex-criminals. The government should reintegrate offenders back into society and unhide their light under a bushel.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the jail should restrict corporal punishment which usually happens.
In addition
Linking Words
, if the community takes their bias into consideration about a custodial person, it will be a chance for delinquents to make a fresh start.
For example
Linking Words
, there are many ex-criminals who still live in harmony with one another after leaving the prison under the aid of the public. In conclusion, punishing wrongdoers is necessary, yet compassion is equally important after the sentence has been served to prevent re-offending.
Submitted by rosieg53 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rehabilitation
  • Reintegrate
  • Social stigma
  • Recidivism
  • Criminal records
  • Ex-offender
  • Associations
  • Comprehensive
  • Workforce
  • Mentoring
  • Incentivize
  • Stigmatize
  • Subsidies
  • Legitimate
What to do next:
Look at other essays: