IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In recent years, the family structure has changed, as well as family roles. What are the changes occurring? Do you think these changes are positive or negative?

#years #structure #roles #changes
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
We are seeing changes in the structure and roles of families in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
recent years that we would not have imagined in the past century. Same-gender parenting is one of them. I feel that
such
Linking Words
 a non-traditional family type has negative impacts on the
child
Use synonyms
, even though it may benefit the
parents
Use synonyms
 themselves. Same-gender marriage, which was illegal in the olden days, is getting common recently. Human-rights activists, as well as LGBT societies, are lobbying governments around the globe to allow same-sex couples to officially tie the knot.
As a result
Linking Words
, most countries have now legalised the marriage of woman and woman or man and man. These couples would either adopt children or create their biological
Use synonyms
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
show examples
 with the help of advanced medical techniques.
This
Linking Words
 has made a huge impact
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the family structure, which has a father and a mother to a
child
Use synonyms
 traditionally. My friend, who is
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
she, has a girlfriend.
However
Linking Words
, her family strongly opposed their relationship as they are conservative and could not accept it. Children of
such
Linking Words
 families would likely suffer psychologically when they reach a certain age. When they notice the difference between their family and that of their friends, they would start questioning their
parents
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 difference would get more and more obvious, especially on certain days
such
Linking Words
 as
parents
Use synonyms
 day or mothers day or fathers day.
This
Linking Words
 could hurt the children emotionally if they could not take it well. My friend's
parents
Use synonyms
 eventually allowed their daughter's relationship with another woman based on a mutual agreement that they would not have any
child
Use synonyms
. I believe her
parents
Use synonyms
 thought of the consequences beforehand to have come to
such
Linking Words
agreement
Correct article usage
an agreement
show examples
. To conclude, modernisation has allowed changes that we might not have thought of before. One
such
Linking Words
 change is
Add an article
a
the
show examples
same-sex marriage which, I believe, could bring happiness only to the couple themselves.
Submitted by Wai on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Family structure
  • Modern family
  • Extended family
  • Nuclear family
  • Same-sex parent families
  • Breadwinner
  • Caregiving responsibilities
  • Family dynamics
  • Globalization
  • Economic shifts
  • Migration
  • Child-free lifestyles
  • Cohabitation
  • Traditional marriage
  • Perceptions
  • Homemaker
  • Communication
  • Shared activities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: