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Band 6

Some people think that teenagers should be requested an unpaid job in their free time. They believe that these will be helpful for both individual teenagers and local communities. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #job #time #communities
In today's fast-changing society, most of the younger
generations
 are more talented than the older
generations
. It is believed that young
people
 should volunteer for their
communities
 in their leisure
time
,
although
 some
people
 argue and think that it is unnecessary. From my point of view, I generally agree with the latter view and think that
teenagers
 should spend their
time
 on entertaining activities. In the following paragraphs, the reason to support my view will be discussed in detail. On the one hand, a large number of parents believe that their children have adequate potential to develop their neighbourhood.
This
 is because the younger
generations
, especially generation z, are tech-savvy.
Therefore
, these
people
 can contribute greatly to the wealth and well-being of their
communities
 by promoting their local products and services. According to a recent news report,
teenagers
 in Suanpak village, a suburb of Bangkok, play a key role in raising awareness about the tourism of their hometown, resulting in the success of
this
 place.
On the other hand
, it is said that
teenagers
 should spend their leisure
time
 on activities that they are interested
instead
 of volunteering for their
communities
. Statistics indicate that
people
 aged 12-20 should have their spare
time
 to do something they like
such
 as watching movies, playing sports, and so on.
This
 will help them find their talents and maximize them, leading to their successful lives.
In addition
, spending
time
 with
communities
 will make
teenagers
 lack
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
socializing
skills
. The younger
generations
 can develop their interpersonal
skills
 by meeting new
people
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 same age.
Therefore
, the more
teenagers
 spend their
time
 with
communities
, the more they lose their essential
skills
. To sum up, it can be concluded that
although
 having teenage volunteers is beneficial for
communities
,
teenagers
 should spend their free
time
 on interesting activities in order to develop their talents and communication
skills
. In my opinion, the disadvantages of having teenage volunteers in
communities
 generally outweigh the advantages.
Submitted by methamongsri on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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