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Band 5

it is believed that women are more suited to child -rearing than men. what is your opinion on this issues?

#women #child #men
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Many individuals opine that females are more effective in nurturing children in comparison with men. I concur with the given assertion.
This
 essay
explain
Change the verb form
explains
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 factors
such
 as giving birth and efficiency that demonstrates they are apt for
such
 a pursuit.
Women
 give birth to children, and they tend to spend much time together in the initial period. It is crucial for a child to dwell with her mother for at least six months, and they could not go anywhere outside until the period ends.
Moreover
, infants spend maximum duration with their mother when they grow because of the bond that arrives while living with
mother
Correct pronoun usage
their mother
show examples
 in the beginning.
Therefore
, offsprings are way too comfortable in sharing vital details about their life with mothers that helps in the flourishment of their career.
For instance
, mothers are the
first
 teachers of their
Correct your spelling
children
children's
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
 when they spend time together after birth, which leads to a strong connection with each other.
Furthermore
, females are more energetic in doing and fulfilling multitudes of responsibilities. According to researchers,
women
 are more capable
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 handling various tasks throughout
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 day and able to finish activities with the r effectiveness.
Moreover
, men could get lethargic and reluctant after a few tasks;
however
, ladies could readily complete all the necessary duties, which
also
 include taking care of their
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
show examples
.
For example
,
women
 are well educated and
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
 in various organizations, and along with
that
Add a comma
,that
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 they assist their infants with their studies and other significant pursuits as well. In conclusion, men and
women
 are important in
contribution
Replace the word
contributing
show examples
 towards the development of a child.
However
,
women
 are the most favourable gender for the burgeoning of the offsprings
Submitted by shailjameel2410 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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