IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some students works while studying. This often results in lacking time for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

#students #works #results #time #education #pressure
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The access
Correct article usage
Access
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 to education became tangible nowadays;
however
Linking Words
, some
students
Use synonyms
 still have difficulties
to maintain
Change the verb form
maintaining
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 themselves studying. It can be financial or family issues, many people have their motives to divide their
time
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 between
work
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 and
study
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. Frequently, it can generate personal and development problems. The practice of
work
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 and
study
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, at the same, is a challenge. The lack of
time
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 is not the only problem. When people
study
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part
Add a hyphen
part-time
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time
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 and
work
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
for
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 the rest of the day, they see themselves exhausted at night. Not only
a
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apply
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physical exhaustion
,
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apply
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 but
a
Correct article usage
apply
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mental as well because many times,
students
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 are not capable to enjoy
a
Correct article usage
apply
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leisure
time
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. Together, the tiredness and absence of
time
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 to keep a rhythm of
study
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 at their houses
,
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apply
show examples
 reflects on their
education
Replace the word
educational
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 development.
Consequently
Linking Words
, a pressure to equilibrate and get
Add an article
a handle
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handle
Wrong verb form
handled
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 with all
this
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appear
Add the particle
to appear
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. With
this
Linking Words
 sensation became common to see
students
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 with psychological problems,
such
Linking Words
 as depression and anxiety. Not always is possible to dedicate exclusively to
study
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,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
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 is extremely necessary the ability to see our limits. The capability to notice signs and symptoms of exhaustion, stress and anxiety and search for help is essential. Sometimes, people just need to slow down and follow their own pace.
Take
Wrong verb form
Taking
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 fewer classes
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 college or
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreasing
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 hours of
work
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 are some of the solutions to think about it. Based on
this
Linking Words
, it is easy to find a person who
divide
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divides
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time
Use synonyms
 between
work
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 and studies. The lack of
time
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 to
study
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 more at home or to enjoy free
time
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 are some reasons to
students
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feeling
Wrong verb form
feel
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 under pressure and develop psychological problems.
Be
Wrong verb form
Being
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 capable to notice how
this
Linking Words
 routine is affecting wealth being and
study
Use synonyms
 development is necessary to keep a better
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
.
Submitted by thaismesequep on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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