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Band 7

some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. others however say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measures
What is the best measure in order to improve public
health
 is a controversial topic. While some
people
 think that the
number
 of
sports
facilities
 should be increased, others believe that the
government
 should take other measures.
This
 essay, as my opinion leads to, will try to elaborate on both points of view and my opinion with some considerations. To commence with, it is true that the significant rise in the
number
 of
sports
facilities
 like gym helps the public to have good
health
, I suppose. It is mainly because local
people
 are able to exercise easily at these
facilities
 when gyms are close to their homes.
In other words
, even if they cannot have enough time to exercise, they can work out whenever they want wherever they want because of the great
number
 of
sports
facilities
. What is more, another reason is that there are professional instructors at these places, which means that
people
 can lose weight or have good building effectively.
Therefore
, there is no doubt that the
number
 of
sports
facilities
 can generate advantages for local
people
, definitely. Despite the aforementioned advantages, I believe that the
government
 should focus more on the daily diet. I think that the main reason is that there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 a lot of unhealthy food which is high in calories from sugar or fat with little important nutritional components and affordable for the average consumers.
That is
 to say, the
government
 should take some measures to prohibit local
people
 from eating
this
 food.
In addition
, the
government
 should help the supermarkets to sell more fruits and vegetables can help
people
 to lose weight and are keep their
health
 good. To sum up, it is true that both ideas are effective ways to improve public
health
;
however
, I personally believe that daily diet is more much important when it comes to public
health
 because food is an essential part of
people
 lives.
Submitted by Alex on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
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