Although many people value their public parks, this space could be better used for other purposes such as residential areas for the ever growing population or to develop business and boost economies. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#people #value #parks #space #purposes #areas #population #business #economies

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There is an opinion in society that spaces

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

occupied by public parks can find more efficient uses

such

Linking Words

as residential blocks or business centres. I firmly disagree with

this

Linking Words

idea. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I plan to explain my way of viewing

this

Linking Words

phenomenon.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the most prominent fact that makes me think opposite to

this

Linking Words

idea is green areas which are crucial for individuals as they give an opportunity to feel closer to nature.

Moreover

Linking Words

, I am convinced that governments should invest in developing

such

Linking Words

places.

For example

Linking Words

, in my city there used to be a lot of abandoned parks that were reorganized later, and now local habitants are grateful to the authorities who did

this

Linking Words

as they can find a place to walk or just to sit under the trees' shadow.

Secondly

Linking Words

, if a country has a deadly hot climate,

such

Linking Words

green islands become vitally required and crucial. No doubt, the more

such

Linking Words

kinds of spaces we have in the neighbourhood, the clearer and oxygenated air we have. Obviously, these territories are the source of fresh air

due to

Linking Words

the huge number of trees and plants.

For instance

Linking Words

, I can remember the case when the park was reconstructed and

then

Linking Words

there was an amusement park built

instead

Linking Words

with various attractions but without greens. It was a completely failed project because no one goes there during the day, but only in the evening.

To conclude

Linking Words

, I wholeheartedly believe that humanity highly needs natural environments, and business

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

and living districts can be placed anywhere else.

Submitted by ruben.kirakosyan on Wed Apr 24 2024

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Introduction Enhancement

To enhance your essay, ensure that your introduction briefly mentions both sides of the argument before stating your position. This provides a well-rounded overview of the topic to the readers.

Grammar Variation

Your essay would benefit from more varied sentence structures and a higher usage of complex grammatical constructions to demonstrate linguistic flexibility.

Specific Examples Depth

Include more specific examples to support your arguments. While you provided some, digging deeper into these examples or incorporating statistical data or studies could strengthen your argument.

Proofread

Be mindful of minor spelling or grammar errors, as they can slightly distract the reader. Proofreading more thoroughly can help polish your essay.

Thesis Statement

You have a clear thesis statement that sets a strong foundation for the rest of your essay.

Paragraph Structure

Your paragraphs are well-organized, with each one focusing on a single main idea, effectively supported by examples or explanations.

Conclusion Strength

The conclusion effectively summarizes the essay's main points and reiterates your stance on the issue, providing a strong closure.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Although many people value their public parks, this space could be better used for other purposes such as residential areas for the ever growing population or to develop business and boost economies. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

in spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this case? What can be done about this problem?

Today, an increasing number of younger individuals have to compete with older generations for the same positions. What challenges arise from this situation? What solutions would you propose?

The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

Some people believe that teaching children at home is the best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.